Roger and Roy Morning Show

Twas The Night Before The Day Before Christmas

2010-12-24T00:07:00.000-08:00

Just Me and The Mouse sitting around talking things over late night/early morning.

I know already I'm not getting exactly what I wanted for Christmas. But I still consider the journey North to have been a success. And, even though the diagnosis, prognosis and treatments are patty much the same as those from MD Anderson and Baylor in Dallas; I got a chance to meet and mingle with an excellent staff at CTCA Mid-Med. All three facilities recommend I commence taking "Nexavar" which I intend to upon my return to Texas.

I had so many memorable experiences and adventures, I hope I can keep them filed in my brain so I can describe them more fully in the coming days.

Right now I'm staying with a member of the Northern Branch of my GENEology, my niece Erin and her husband Wally #1. For Christmas Eve we will gather all available members of the Munse/Murphy clan together under the same roof for the first time in many, many years. It will either be a touching, sentimental photo-op, or A Griswald get-together.

So another opportunity to thank you for everything you've done for me in the last several months. I can't emphasize enough what it has all meant: your notes, letters, phone calls, in-person greetings, donations and-of course- your prayers. Please save a spot for me in them.

I'll write again when I get a chance.

STAYIN' ALIVE

2010-12-16T16:53:00.000-08:00

Okay. I know it's been a while since my last post. I know I've left some of you dangling with either incomplete or altered information regarding my health. I know I should have some kind of real excuse or explanation why it's taken me so long to put finger to keyboard. I should, but I don't. So I can't. I'm pretty sure it's Someone Else's Fault, tho.

All I can say for sure is that the Continuing Story has been just as complicatedly confusing as previous installments. So, it's not for lack of material that I have been tardy. I could write a BOOK! (or at least a Blog).

Let me just start with Current Events and work backward until the time is is all accounted for or I nod out. It's after midnight and I'm still awake. If I should doze, I know that I will bolt upright wide awake again at 2am. That's the way this pain pill I take (sporadically) works. Even though it says right on the side of the container “may cause drowsiness” it has the exact opposite affect on me. And, strangely, always at 2am. No matter what time of day I pop the pill, I can bank on the 2am mandatory wake-up. What is further nutty about this side-effect/ reaction is that fatigue and the sleepys have been my biggest problem of late. I also have occasional stomach cramps which I am using the meds to treat.

Then there's the skin irritation. I had noticed several weeks back that I was getting TheItchThatWouldNotBeScratched on my back(always that place I can't quite reach) and that it seemed to be progressing to other areas, remaining unquenchable. Dr Vencatraj at the local Hope Cancer Center said she thought it was leftover extra-effects from last summers Chemo.

Her advice was, “Whatever you do, don't scratch it!!” This, as you may have guessed, is the medical equivalent of advising a friend NOT to think of Pink Elephants, or getting “Achy Breaky Heart” stuck on “repeat” in your brain ipod. I have become singularly focused on Itching & Scratching. I've added oceans of lotions, potions, and notions to my already-lengthy, steadily-increasing daily prescription list. ARGGHH!

This weekend I am going for a visit to The Cancer Treatment Centers of America
Midwestern Regional Medical Center. (or, “CTCA Mid-Med” as I now will begin referring to it) for a new round of poking, prodding, imaging and bloodletting. As you may recall, I have been to visit The Baylor Medical Center in Dallas and The MD Anderson Cancer Hospital in Houston.

I intend to keep visiting facilities like these until I get the answer I want.

Actually, it is my KORA Microphone-mate Devan O'Neal who found the CTCA for me. Back a few months ago when I was battling the Admissions Department at Anderson and deciphering funds and payments from First Care Insurance, I was becoming frustrated to the edge of a nervous breakdown, I decided to divvy up the load of inquiries I was trying to (unsuccessfully) handle myself. The Admissions People at MD Anderson turned out to some of the most rude, unco-operative, unhelpful and mean people I've yet to deal with. Not only were they obstinate, but they were wrong about the obstacles to treatment they kept throwing in my path. (I keep saying “they”, but, in truth it was one, single callous bureaucrat that gummed up my own personal works).

So Devan took on the task of trying to crack that particular nut. Unlike me, however, she went looking for somewhere else to take my business (Brilliant!!) after a couple of rounds with the MDA woman and found CTCA.
Now I know I should judge these places primarily by the services, treatments, and results they give, but these folks (so far) have been so polite, so informative, so accommodating I could not help but be impressed.

Now, we need to rewind the story a bit:

After my initial run-ins with The Mean Bureaucrat who told me the day before I had finally managed to schedule appointments that I needed to pay $5,000.00 upfront. The first she had mentioned it was the day before. I was unable to pay that amount at the moment and canceled the visit. By the way, no discussion of alternate payment plans or financial assistance was offered or advised. A couple weeks later my Family Doctor, Rusty Bacak, called me in for a fairly routine appointment on other health issues. He had no idea that I had been knocking on MD Anderson's door, he wasn't told of any of my most recent Baylor visits. Nor did he know I'd had Chemo therapy. He wasn't even informed of my liver cancer diagnosis itself. He immediately hooked me up with Dr. Venkatraj and the Hope Cancer Center. She immediately went to work trying to penetrate the MD Anderson Force Field. Luckily she had an “in”, a contact in Onocology, Dr. O.A. Kaseb (no, not Kasey Kaseb who used to do “American Top Forty”, a doctor guy). So I got rescheduled for a Houston Trip and, in the process, discovered I not only did not need to cough up 5K for my first visit, but I had actually already reached the top limit on my out-of-pocket medical expenses for the year. I thought all the Doctors in my vast overreaching Medical Staff, Entourage and Fraternity were being CC'd of all my testing and treatments. Now I know. I'll need to get summaries and hand-delivery copies to all my personnels.

The results of my Kaseb/Venkatraj diagnoses, in the proverbial nutshell:
It is now unlikely that I will be able to get a new or gently-used liver. I am off the transplant list.
My condition is considered “inoperable”
There is no specific date or timetable for an obvious decline in health
There is, likewise, no set time or occasion that I would have to stop “working”.
The radiation treatment will not be used, nor do I qualify for any of the current Clinical Trials going on.
Where I once wasn't sick enough to warrant a prime spot on the liver-list, now I am too sick to qualify for any of the lists. What I'd like to know is: when was the time “just right”? And how did we miss it? Was it a window of weeks, days or minutes?

Both Doctors wanted me to begin a new chemical regimen featuring “Nexavar” a new Miracle Drug available at selected pharmacies for a mere $3000 a month. Even that took weeks of haggling, finagling, wheelin' and dealin' to secure. And then, just as I was ready to begin my closely supervised oral treatment, the CTCA possibility opened up.

Now, the whole CTCA process may be all for naught. They may come to the same conclusions as my previous Doctors and send me back home with just few extra holes and a little less fluid in me. But, they are going to fly me and a caregiver to the Mid-Med in Zion, IL, feed and house me for a week all for around $75. Now close and long-time observers of the Roy Gene Life and Career may recall I spent 18 of my formative years in Illinois. A few miles to the south of Zion, actually, in Chicago. I still have two brothers, a sister, and several nieces, nephews, friends and school chums who still live in the South Suburban area. I haven't been back to visit in several years since Mama Gene moved down HERE. So, you can understand the appeal for me.

Okay, I think we're up-to-date now. I had many many more notes for topics of discussion and debate, but they'll have to wait. I'll try to keep you posted on the latest rounds from CTCA Mid-Med. Hopefully I'll be able to update more frequently before the year expires, and then regularly in the New Year (where have I heard that before?).

Run For Roy

2010-11-18T01:53:00.000-08:00

Red White & Blue 5k Run for Roy

Registration for this event is open from: Oct. 18, 10 - Nov. 19, 10

TWS Red White & Blue Charity Extravaganza

Where: Texas World Speedway - College Station, Texas

Nov. 20, 10

Time: 12 pm - 1 pm

Registration (click)

TWS Map (click)

The Run for Roy 5k will sprint off at 12:00 pm. This one of a kind Fun Run will find you racing at a world renown racetrack. The route will take place on track at Texas World Speedway, with t-shirts provided for pre-registered entrants and prizes to be awarded to each four age divisions, male and female. Tickets are $20 in advance and $25 the day of the event.

We are proud to announce proceeds from the 5k Run for Roy will benefit Roy Gene Munse, the local morning show host from 98.3 KORA (Follow Roy's blog here). Please join us in the Run for Roy 5k at TWS to support Roy Gene in his fight with liver cancer and his route to a liver transplant. We have all listened to and enjoyed the Roger and Roy show in the Brazos Valley. Your 5k registration will benefit a world class gentleman who has entertained and put smiles on so many faces in the Brazos Valley.

The Long and Short of It

2010-08-14T07:19:00.001-07:00

I guess it's time for an update. Due to popular demand and my son's insistence. Alex, who gets out a lot more than me, says The Public keeps asking him questions. For some reason he is unable to get away with the same smart-Alec (Smart-Alex?) replies I give (either that, or feels guilty when he does), and would like to know to truth of the situation so he can adjust his comments accordingly. I would have written last weekend, but I was still dazed and confused. I would have written first of the week, but I was stupefied. By mid-week: flabbergasted. Today I'm just plain out of excuses and elucidation.
First off, and right to the point, the news isn't good. I could sense that immediately when Dr. Walberg asked me if I was reading any long books. As fate/luck would have it, I'm right in the middle of the first book of the Stieg Larsson Millennium-trilogy. At least it isn't Tolstoy.
Chemo-Therapy has not only not shrunk the liver tumors, but they got bigger. Plus some new ones have set up camp. So instead the Weed-B-Gon of cancer, my doses were more like Miracle-Grow. I am not that good at reading scans like X-rays, and sono-grams and Magnetic Resonance Imaging. You could show me a black and white reproduction of an octopus and I'd think I saw vital human organs. But when the doctor showed me images side-by-side of pictures from May and then last week it was clear as The Visible Man model to me. Remember: I just needed to shrink the tumors small enough to swap livers. The Transplant was the whole reason for these 4-5 years of medical pandemonium.
So, off the transplant list, Chemo ineffective,what's a Poor Boy to do? That's what I spent the last week trying to figger.
I have few options remaining. One is a new Miracle Drug that costs roughly A $Billion Dollars, the other is a Clinical Trial to use some Not-Ready-For-Prime-Time therapy and another is start shopping for a nice looking urn. Actually my first move will be to secure a Second Opinion, probably from MD Anderson. I am still waiting for contact from the investigators on the Test Pilot Program. I also waiting to see how much my insurance will kick in for the meds.
In the meantime, if you'd like to help, you can get your very own commemorative green “Team Roy Gene” wristband at Maaco, Longhorn Tavern Steakhouse and the KORA studios 1240 Villa Maria. A $10 – 20 donation is suggested. And watch our website 983kora.com for other fun with fundraisers.
I'll letcha know any changes, updates and applications.
Thank you, God bless you and Happy Shark Week.

Studying For The Tests (A Continuing Story)

2010-07-28T03:07:00.000-07:00

This Friday I (finally) return to Baylor Medical Center in Dallas to (hopefully) be given some sort of (positive) verdict. It's been a long, hard wait made only longer and harder by my problems trying to book my next procedures.

As you probably know by this point, I am rasslin' with a nasty liver featuring cancer tumors and scar tissue from Cirrhosification. If we can arrest the cancer growth (loitering), I can get me a brand new (or gently used) healthy liver. (See previous posts for excruciating and ceaselessly fecund details)

This was my Summer of Chemo with therapy starting in mid-May, and then a second application in June. I was to wait 4-6 weeks before strapping on the equipment for an MRI, blood-work and consultation to see if we'd done any good.

Long about week 3, post-hospital, I began calling for my appointment. It took numerous calls to succeed. Armed with only a phone number and a nurse's name from Texas Oncology, I proceed to wind through the matrix that is modern-day voice-directed phone answering. After a mis-button-press or two I finally got the voice mail, where I dutifully left my information: Name, Number, Date of Birth.

After a week of no reply, I re-entered the telephonic cryptogram and got the nurse who acknowledged my call, but said she couldn't decipher my (real) last name. Now, my (real) last name is Munse (pronounced MUN-see). It is rarely pronounced or written correctly on first meeting, so I am in the habit of spelling out my name after every utterance. I'm not saying she was LYING, but...well, maybe I AM saying that.

So I ask, once again, how do I get scheduled for an MRI and can I do it here (in B/CS) or need to head North? She says “Oh you don't need to call me, just contact the Magnetic Resonance Imaging department!” and “Yes, you have to come to Dallas so they can use the same scanners as they used for the original pictures in the morning and you can chat with the Doc in the afternoon”

So, says I, how do I get the MRI and Doc visit on the same day? She says “I can do that for you!” Then, wiping the foam and spittle from my mouth, I tell her to book me soon as possible. She tosses out a few dates (I had requested either a Monday or Friday, so as not to mess up my broadcast week too much). I say “Fine”. She says “Let me check with the Doctor and call you back” Only she doesn't. Call me back.

After a few more days go by Butch (from Maaco) offers to sic his wife, Nelda, on the lot of them. I hesitate and give it one more chance. This time I get the OTHER nurse (the one who treats me and my condition as serious as cancer). I think she can sense my imminent melt-down and moves quickly to calm me down. She gives me her direct line as well the one belonging to Bad Nurse. She says to call her (Good Nurse) if the other (Bad Nurse) fails to call by noon the following day. An audibly chastened Bad Nurse calls the next day at the studios. On the business line. Due to our flawless modern technology, the receptionist can't call you when you're in the production studio, so she left one of them “while you were out” notes from Bad Nurse. When I get into phone contact with Bad Nurse, she claims the biz number is the only one I have. Never mind that I've already donated several pounds of paperwork to several Baylor Med offices with all my information in TRIPLICATE every time I visit the premises for the last 5 or 6 years, THEY DON'T HAVE MY PHONE NUMBERS OR KNOW HOW TO SPELL MY NAME.

(Hulk Mad! Hulk Crush!)

There is actually much more to this story, some I've trimmed, some I've omitted. Bottom line is I'm going in on Friday morning to get tested and review results. I don't know what happens after that. I've quit trying to calculate what further treatments await with positive or negative result. I'm not even sure what CONSTITUTES a positive or negative result. I just take the next step after the current one is complete.

Meanwhile, on the fund-raising front, your green “Team Roy Gene” bracelet is now available. Get one for yourself, your spouse, your mistress, your paramour, your cousins, nephews and crazy uncles. The whole dang family. For a suggested donation of $5 -10, pick up at Maaco, Texas Longhorn Steakhouse, the KORA Studios, my son Alex (RG2) and other soon-to-be-announced locations. You may also make a random donation via PayPal on the KORA website. Use according to instructions, only as directed.

7/26/2010

Rip van Roygene

2010-06-25T00:51:00.000-07:00

Slowly the fog lifts. My eyes focus. My ears begin to translate strange fuzzy frequencies. My pulse increases, my breathing becomes full. My blood circulates and warms to it’s proper temperature. My hibernation must be coming to a conclusion. I take one tentative step and then another. Pretty soon I am standing upright, erect, though walking wobbly. I hear the cell phone calling me. I pick it up, checking the caller ID before I answer, lest some pesky bill collector wants to ask when I’m gonna send a check (no one believes “soon”, “never” is too blunt, and “as soon as my health improves” just sounds like a dodge, so I’d rather not answer at all). It is safe. It is from a trusted Frambly member. I hit the “talk” button and say “So what’s new?”. Only I don’t exactly say that. That is the message my brain has assembled but as it passes my lips it becomes more liquid and lispy. Kinda like running it through Sylvester the Cat. Thus the results of Chemo #2. Sufferin' Succotash!

I haven't been able to update you as much as I had planned because I haven't been able to stay conscious long enough to operate a keyboard. This extends all the way to last week. About Wednesday (or pretty much smack dab in the middle of Chemo Drip #2 ) I began feeling sick to my stomach and sleepy. By Thursday, if I wasn't throwing up bile, I was asleep. Sometimes the two of them dangerously overlapped. It got to where just the smell of food would cue an expulsion. So, obviously, I didn't eat much for the remainder of my visit.

By Friday everything hurt. I couldn't move, couldn't reach my nightstand table, couldn't eat food. That's when they gave me the morphine (I thought I was gonna get Tylenol. Extra Strength) and everything pretty much disappeared until Saturday.

Charlie Haldeman came to get me on Saturday (you remember Charlie from the KORA afternoon shift several years ago, now a big-time star TV newsguy in Sherman). I rolled in to town, through my front door and after a perfunctory “Hello” and “Adios” I was back asleep, where I have remained far much longer that I expected, at least comparing this time time to my last Chemo bout several weeks ago.

The mouth sores returned on Sunday. They, too, seem to be more plentiful and painful than last time. I have several concoctions I swish in my mouth to numb and heal these, but still my diet has been mostly soup and Glucerna smoothie. Until Thursday, I couldn't even get my mouth open wide enough to get anything in. And then, if I get the slightest touch of salt or spice or sauce, I bounce off the ceiling.

Today, I'm feeling a bit better. I only slept through half the day as opposed to ¾ of the day. I have less sores, though still in critical areas: the tip and top of my tongue and both sides near where the teeth rub up against it (YEEEOWWWCH). If I can return my speaking voice to a non-cartoonish timbre, I hope to be back on the air on Monday. Keep ya posted.

RANDOM RAMBLINGS

I had a to-do list of things I wanted to do whilst under treatment at the Baylor Med Cen. It looks eerily like the list that I prepared tor this week. Mysteriously none of items on either list have been crossed off. Well, there's always the weekend,

I hate when people try to tell me what they dreamed of last night, but this is kinda different. Almost every night at some point I'll be in mid-dream, even mid-sentence, and wake up saying that last thing aloud. I mean, I'll be making some statement in Dreamland and suddenly be beack in the Real World finishing that sentence. Weird. Never had that happen to me before, and now it happens every night. Could it still be the morphine talking?

My apologies to Butch and Nelda, who both inquired to my Howabouts early in the week. I sent a text to Butch telling him I couldn't talk right now. Literally couldn't talk. As in “Unable to speak”. But I know Butch ain't exactly Mr. Gadget when it comes to modern communications and social networking.(No website, no email, no Facebook,etc). He does have a cell phone. I tried to text him a message but I'm not sure if A) it got through or B) he would know how to retrieve it. Anyhow, thanks to you both for the concern.

Sufferin' Succotash!

Nope. Not ready yet.

Roy Gene's Bedside Reader

2010-06-15T15:51:00.000-07:00

It's a little more difficult to be your intrepid reporter (insipid?) to post stories this time due to logistics, aesthetics and feng shui. When they went to install the liver blasting tube, previously located on the right side of me, they found it was still sore from the last application (I'll say it was!), therefore, the Medical Team put it on the left side, snaking through a spaghetti-like course of veins, arteries and hoses to connect to the liver, where it is to be doused with several bags of poison for the remainder of the week. The Chemo drip is a tiny tube that runs inside the artery. They showed me the last one they had in me when they fished it out after the process, it was about seven or eight inches long. I think this one will be much longer. It feels like about 25 feet worth.
Now in my palatial celebrity hospital room, the furniture and equipment is the opposite. In other words, the drip apparatus is all on the right of the bed, while the insertion hole is on the left. That means the main tube has to drape across my lower abdomen. I mention this because if the hose kinks up anywhere and flow interrupted, an alarm goes off getting progressively louder until it is un-kinked or reset. If it goes too long, it won't reset at all without the help of my RN or Tech. Or, in extreme cases, the guy in the next room tired of the racket.
The reason I'm to remain horizontal through-out this ordeal is because the spot where they drill in to me is right there on the fault line of belly and legs and dang near impossible to keep straight. So every time I make the slightest of move, I have a potential 3-Alarmer ready to launch. Sometimes I can wiggle around and get it all back in order, sometimes I can only make it worse.
Then there's the matter of the bed. It moves all by itself. I don't mean I'll find myself out in the hallway after a long sleep, but it is constantly readjusting to ease pressure points to lessen the possibility of bedsores. Well, you know what happens: The bed moves, my body moves, the hose kinks, the alarm goes off. It's got me scared to move.
There is something good about this bed; it's got a scale built-in. So when they take all my vitals - which they do on an ample, regular basis - I can get the poundage without moving to the scale. My bed-scale shows me to be 24lbs less than the measurement I got in B/CS just two weeks ago. They did a re-weigh to insure the results (despite my protestations). Still the same. I can only conclude I am lighter in Dallas, or gravity is weaker. I need this scale at home. Although, unfortunately, my waistline has not been notified of the change and my "fat pants" are still a bit snug.
When I first arrived in the room Monday morning, I started assembling my command post. From previous experience, I knew I wouldn't get much opportunity to re-arrange, so I tried to get everything within arm's reach. As you can guess, the problem is whenever I reach over to pull something out of the strategically placed nightstand and drawers, I kink the line and sound the alarm.
My room is situated reverse of my last one, so my table-tray has one storage bin that faces away from me, toward the wall. In addition to being difficult to access, it makes the alarm go off. Of course.
I placed the laptop atop the tray (Thanks again, Tom Fussell) but the cord is too short (note to self: Bring extension cord), and when they bring my food tray in, we pull out the hidden surface and the meal ends up between me and the keyboard. Then, whether I eat or not, I gotta wait for the tray to be cleared before I can go back to my online activities. I could try to move it myself, but there's no where close to put it. Besides, it would just set off the alarm.

Well, gotta go. My Night Nurse Caitlin (a good Irish girl) needs to install a new bag of Cancer Elixir. It's number 2. I need a total of 3.5 to complete the set.

Leftovers

2010-06-14T20:15:00.000-07:00

As you may know, I'm back in "stir" at the Baylor Med Center in Dallas for ChemoThon 2. I want to tell you a few things about my Latest Adventures in Medicine, but first I wanted to clear out some old stuff. Some gently used information of the past few weeks.

About two weeks after my previous protective custody, I noticed stray hairs on the microphone. I was at work, so it seemed odd. Not that a hairy microphone would not be odd at home, just that I use them more at work. Microphones, that is, not hair. Anyhow, I picked and flicked them and promptly forgot about them. Minutes later, I noticed more stray hairs on the microphone. Using my superior powers of deduction and detection (not to mention "inflection") I came to the conclusion "Something's causing that". I pinched a lock of my own locks between my index finger and thumb and received a clumpful of unattached hair. I repeated the process over and over again to insure the validity of my first test. Then once more just to freak out Brandie Alexander. It was true. I was losing my coiffure (I assume) to Chemo . So, I did the only thing I could think of. I went to Sport Clips and had 'em finish me off. After freaking them out with a couple of tufts I let them harvest, I offered the chance at the easiest haircut they'd do all week. Possibly all month.

I've never taken the chance to listen to the "field" recording we made for the Endless Summer of Chemo Benefit at Revolution downtown Bryan, but I got some pictures:

Maybe I'm just scairt of what we really sounded like, and want to preserve that memory in my mind the way I thought it sounded that night. Big thanks to son Alex Gene for putting it all together and getting me back to play for the first time in years.

The very next week, Kathy Ross headlined another Benefit show along with Leanasaurus Rex at Texas Hall of Fame. Both shows were well-attended and well-donated.

There will be more special occasions my Frambly and co-workers will be organizing in the next few weeks and months. Maybe I'll get another chance to play. I got a small taste of how expensive it is to have liver cancer and a transplant this past week when I was asked for a whole pile of money down and my part of an 80/20 split. Did I mention how grateful I am for your assistance?. I hope I don't wear out my welcome in your generous hearts .

More soon.

PO Plenty

2010-06-01T13:35:00.000-07:00

OK. I've been trying to update the blog for several days now with many interesting items and events to report, including my return to The Stage last weekend, a story about Sport Clips, and a couple How-I-Spent-Memorial-Day-Weekend tales. Pictures were essential to the story-telling.

A few months ago I invested in my very own digital camera, so's I could create my own candid shots for fun and business. It is a Samsung. I believe I will remember that brand forever as it has robbed me of very valuable hours of my precious life. Not that it doesn't take good pictures. I'm fine with that. It's even a simple obvious operation. It's the USB/Power connection that's givng me fits. Not having had a digi-cam of my own, I don't know if it's standard to have the power charge cord and the PC connect come from the same slot on the camera. If it is, it's a bad idea. It's certainly a bad idea for this stupid Samsung. When I first charged the unit, I noticed that I had to jiggle the cord a bit before I'd get the green "charge" light. Then I saw I had to wiggle it a little more to download photos.
Today I've spent hours trying to get a connection (yes, HOURS - I'm nothing if not determined) to no avail. There been more wigglin' and jigglin' than the prime time performers at a Gentleman's Club. And for naught.
So, I give up. I will now go to the other room and sulk. And keep all these good stories to myself. Then I will look for my receipt and demand customer satisfaction from the store of origin. Well, I actually bought it way up in the Piney Woods, but there is a franchise locally and I will be forced to vent on them.
Have a nice day.

On With The Show! This is IT!

2010-05-29T01:11:00.000-07:00

Roy Gene's
Endless Summer of Chemo Benefit Show

aka Livers Alive!
or White Blood Cells Are For Losers

Tonight Saturday May 29th at Revolution, Downtown Bryan
211 South Main Street, Bryan, TX (979) 823-4044‎

7pm: Gates Open

8pm: Frankie "Fresh" Eneks (aka Grandbaby Mama)
8:30/9pm(whenever Frankie is done) First Raflle drawing

9:30 Chad Boyd

10:30 Gene Pool (RGs 1 & 2) with Brandie Alexander

11:00 Second Raffle

11:30 Puente

12:30 Gene Pool Rides Again (Roy Gene & Alex Munse & Friends)

1:00 Magic Girl

2:00 Final Raffle Drawing

WWWD?

2010-05-27T15:39:00.000-07:00

Today's BIG NEWS:
Willie Nelson cuts off his pigtails!
Millions of lives disrupted! Fans fall into mass depression. Chris Austin and Lorrie Lynn analyze at 6 and 10 on KBTX! Swine have no comment.

AFTER

BEFORE

Despite the alarm, the tears, and wringing of hands - this is not unprecedented. As you can see from our KORA Willie Hall of Haircuts, The Stranger has actually spent more of his career tail-less than braided:

(that's Willie on the left with unidentified fan)

In these troubled times, we can take solace from an old quotation. I believe it was Benjamin Franklin - or, possibly Mark Twain; or maybe even Confucius who said, "The difference between a BAD haircut and a GOOD haircut is roughly two weeks"

MORE BBQ PIX

2010-05-26T10:54:00.001-07:00

Here's a couple more fotos from The Roy Gene BBQ Fundraiser at Sam's Club last Saturday. I'll post a whole lot more of 'em after I figure out how to load onto the main KORA page.

Roger and Roy discuss the Big Comeback performance

With Brandie Alexander and Brian and Aiden

The Voice of Texas A&M Sports and avid Roger & Roy fan,
Dave South

Undergoing a grilling of my own by KBTX-TV

The Brazos Valley Media Brain Trust
(Ben Downs, Mike Wright, Mary Mike Hatcher)

Don't forget the Live Music fundraiser this Saturday evening at Revolution Downtown Bryan. Featuring Magic Girl, Chris Puentes, Chad Boyd, Frankie Eneks, and The Roy Gene Pool with son Alex and Brandie Alexander.

Special Statement Regarding Saturdays' BAR B Q

2010-05-22T21:10:00.000-07:00

To the Brazos Valley, To R&R Morning Show Fans, To Framily, To Media-rites, To associates, acquaintances and Survivors.

I am still beyond words, rendered speechless and totally incapable of expressing what this day has meant to me.

I love you all
OK. MOST of you

Roy Gene Munse 5/22/2010

Speechless

2010-05-21T03:00:00.000-07:00

I am still stunned, amazed, and eternally grateful for the shows of support for me. Thank you. And keep the cards, letters, emails, phone calls, posts and smoke signals coming.

I missed a couple days correspondence when I hit a bad patch yesterday. I don't know if it was related to the liver problems or some other new, fresh hell. Whatever happened and why, I believe it was triggered by going off-diet on Wednesday night. I had been out doing some light shopping and prescription filling when I decided to hit a drive-through on the way home. Round about 3am it hit back. I had a massive pain in the gut that felt like the worst case of indigestion and heartburn I'd ever had combined. Maybe times ten. In any event, it took me plumb out of living until about 8pm. I was trying to relieve pressure from intake valve to evacuation port and any location in-between. Kinda makes me nervous about what I eat. And when and where. I promise to stay the strait and narrow now, though.

Speaking of eating, hope to see ya at the Rompin' Stompin' Bar B Q this Saturday (as in tomorrow) at Sam's parking lot off By Pass 6 Earl Rudder Freeway. Rumor has it that Butch from Maaco has 80 briskets to cook. Food will be available by the plate, by the pound and by the brisket. If you want a whole brisket, better reserve today. Cause the pit gets fired up tonight. Call Butch at Maaco 823-3008.

Right now the worst of my problems are the sores in my mouth and tongue. When the tongue gets irritated it makes it painful to talk. When it hurts to talk, it makes it unlikely for me to try. That's the main reason I haven't been back on the air yet. Nurse Caitlin from Baylor gave me a litre jug of saltwater and baking soda to clean and rinse to mouthal area. And now Nurse Kathy from the Cancer hospital has recommended a cocktail of Benadryl and Mylanta as a more effective rinse. I'm gonna try today.

No one has asked,really, but I'd like explain a little bit about my ailments and why Baylor Med Center is treating me instead of one of our many fine local Medical Establishments. The main reason is that we don't transplant here in the neighborhood. At least not livers. That is what I was first seeking treatment for (the liver was going way before the cancer was found). When I got the cancer diagnosis it was while on one of my bi-annual check-ups in Dallas. In order to get a new liver, they would have to shrink the tumors. So, as long as I was already up there and had a tab open anyway, that's where I got my Chemo. Round One. By the way I begin Round Two (basically the same treatment as before) on Monday June 14th.

I have been enjoying listening the The Devon O'Neal Morning show featuring Roger Garrett and the Spirit of Roy Gene in my convalescence. I hope I can pass the screening when I want to make my come back. You know, sometimes returning from IR, you find someone else has replaced you.

I was listening to AM Talk Radio the other night when I heard a promo for my BBQ Benefit and was near flabbergasted to hear the Bryan Broadcasting Stations are involved as well- WTAW, KZNE, KNDE. Not that we don't have a lot of history. Ben Downs was one of my first GMs when I arrived in 1979. And I've known most of his staff and crew for many years now. Sometimes, even working at the same facilities. Did I mention Ben is the only person who ever fired me (twice) that I still talk to? Then yesterday I was informed that Aggie96 wanted to promote the event as well. I am truly honored and humbled by the outpouring. I feel like I should be sicker than I am to deserve this response.

A couple closing notes: My son, Alex Munse, is working on another Benefit Show for next weekend at Revolutions Downtown. Give ya more details next time or you can contact him via his Facebook page. Individual cash donations can be made at The Bank and Trust.

Roy Gene

Surprise! It's Me, Again!

2010-05-17T03:58:00.000-07:00

Didn't mean to leave ya dangling like that. The end of last week turned out a little rougher than expected. Everything was fine and dandy (relatively) until about Thursday afternoon. I started feeling a little nauseous and was losing my appetite (i.e., I had a rumbly in my tumbly that went all gibbity gibbity - Medical Terms). Up till that point I been eating 3 squares a day and cleaning the plates. And I, of course, asked for no chemical assistance for several reasons 1.) PRIDE, I didn't want to mess with my stoic and strong image so carefully cultivated 2.) CHEMICAL OVERLOAD, I didn't want to add another batch of drugs to my already drug-addled system. 3.) PRICE, for some reason I convinced myself it would actually make a dimes worth of difference to my Ultimate Bill if I refused certain medications.
By Friday morning it was bad enough that I begged for anything short of euthanasia to settle things down. I ended up getting three injections during the day, one that made me sleep(ier), two that were supposed to be drowse-free. It's tough to tell which,if any had any affect since I was pretty much groggy for the rest of my incarceration.
I was due to be cut loose on Friday, but they didn't get around to removing my direct-deposit catheter until about 4pm. After removal, they say they wanna keep ya an extra four hours to make sure everything went OK. It wasn't until 10pm that I was officially notified I could get up, move around the cabin, and go to the bathroom all by myself. So I stayed the night.

Side note: I learned much about Bedpan Etiquette while on the inside. The staff all realize how embarrassing and undignified the whole process is, but you only make it worse if you try to read a magazine while on the Mobil-Pot.

Saturday morning as I packed my belongs and prepared for the getaway, I was still feelin' illin', so I drank one of them Breakfast-In-A-Can thingies and promptly turned over my innards and puked through my mouth, my nose and every other facial orifice. I couldn't keep conscious for more than 15 minutes at a time on the way back to B/CS (thanks, Gail)and then plopped into my own Bed Sweet Bed and kept the snoozing marathon going until noon Sunday.

They told me the side effects from Direct Chemo would be less, so here's my personal final tally: nauseousness, diminished appetite, fatigue, drowsiness, mouth sores. Glad I didn't get the full strength.
I had been planning to return to the airwaves today (Monday) but yesterday evening I made a judgement call to wait till Tuesday , the 18th.

I gotta go back for Round Two of Chemo in about three weeks.

Thanks again for your emails, texts, postings, phone calls, thoughts and prayers.
Please forgive me if I don't respond immediately, I will try to acknowledge every one, and every one is important to me.

Roy

Long Distance Shout Outs

2010-05-13T02:41:00.000-07:00

It's Thursday, and that means Shout Out Day! That's the time we set aside every week to acknowledge our listeners by name and mention special people and occasions. Usually, I have a hard time coming up with the unofficial minimum of two. Not that I don't run into R&R fans everywhere, just that I forget to write them down. If I do write them down, I forget where I put the paper. If I find the paper, I can't read my own handwriting or remember where I met those names. This week, I have the opposite problem: I have so many people to thank by name, rank and serial number, I couldn't possibly fit them into the allotted time and space.

Let me start with the staff of The Roberts Hospital at Baylor Medical Center. This bunch has gone way out of their way to make me as comfortable as possible. All shifts, all job-titles, all week. I don't believe I've run across a single surly soul and, on the contrary, have had a number of good conversations with staff about no med-related subjects.

Here on the home front, big props for Butch from Maaco - I don't know why they say he's had a bad heart. My son, Alex Gene (RG2), Ingrid "Zingy" Hightower, Gail Spears, David Decker, James Haislett, Chip Howard, Frankie (my Grandbaby Mama) Chris Kiske, and Ben D. Downs (the only guy who ever fired me - twice - that I'm still on speaking terms).

In addition,those I haven't seen or heard from in quite a while, including Tom Fussell, John T "Dirty" Duncan, Susie Haddox Campbell, Charle Haldeman, Corbin Maclaine, John Thompson, Nurse Susie Kiernan, Frank Devich, Tom Bonelli, Chuck Paulinski, Audrey Shika, and Wayne "Sam" Longeno (in his own, strange way).

My family has been great, too. Thanks, Ma, for not crying. Big Bro Ed, Li'l Bro Bob,Ex-wife Polly, stepdaughter Charly and all my Little Rascals, blood-related or not. My niece Erin, Special kudos for RG3, my grandson, who always gives me a dose of what I need every time I see him.

I'm not forgetting all my Media Friends in Print, Radio and TV. Nor do I ignore the cards, emails, Facebook postings, Comments, Texts, Twitters and old-fashioned telephone calls I've received from friends I've met in person and on the air. Thanks to every last one of you for thinking of me.

Thank you Mr. and Mrs. America from border to border and coast to coast and all the ships at sea.

Finally Roger and Laurie Garrett who have been giving me an assist for a few years now. Special thanks to Roger, who has let me finish several sentences over the past couple weeks.

My apologies for any glaring omissions.

And now, Royce, who have YOU got to Shout Out?

Roy Gene

Wednesday Morning Workout

2010-05-12T03:33:00.000-07:00

Special Correspondent Roy Gene Munse is on Chemo assignment at the Baylor Medical Center in Dallas in case the IRS asks.

Gosh, how time flies when you're flat on your back, as Ashley Dupre would say. Here it is Wednesday already and my sentence is just about halfway served. I'm to be released this weekend (Friday with good behavior). Even though my mobility is restricted, there are several things that remind me of home. Like the room temperature. Just like the KORA studios, it's either too hot or two cold. I was shivering in the middle of last night, when a floor nurse came in and raised the thermostat and loaded me with warm blankets. That was great for a half hour or so, now it's too dang hot! And can't move enough to shake 'em off.

This being Baylor, my electronic devices are limited. Even though there's a free WiFi signal, certain sites are restricted. I'm not even talking about THOSE kind of sites. I'm talking scholarly research. There are certain words that will trigger the Auto-Censor. Like "Chick", "Horn" and "Doodle". And the TV. Some channels are blocked entirely, others when a particular program is on a network. I haven't been able to see any "Dancing With The Stars"

Somehow Baseball must fall under those restrictions. I haven't been able to see a single Rangers game. They are on TV, aren't they? Of course, up here Astros are out of the question. Cubs,too.

And...as far as the portable Hard Drives I brought along, I haven't been able to make much progress there, either. And not just because I can barely get my face above the keyboard. But because of a little tiny USB memory stick containing vital documents that I can't seem to find. Neither can the nurses.

I'll just add it to my checklist for NEXT time. They assure me there will be a second round of this.

I guess none of my entertainment choices matter very much since I can only stay awake about two or three hours at a time. And when I sleep, my dreams are uncensored, unedited and unfettered.

Day One

2010-05-11T03:08:00.000-07:00

OK, I got me a Chemo drip going direct to my liver. Besides not being able to sit upright, it's not too bad. Although it does make it difficult to use the word processor on the laptop.

Yesterday, as they were explaining to me what they had planned, I gotta admit, I was terrified. Stick a catheter into an artery in my leg, then snake it around until we hit liver. Then hang a bag of Chemo drip on by bed and drip for several days (see diagram above).
I said "I will me knocked out while this is taking place, right?"
Nope.
I was to be under conscious sedation. Which means I would be aware of the people around me and able to respond to simple requests, but not able to carry on a conversation. You know, kinda like the Morning Show.

At least assistant who shaved me "down there" was a pretty girl although she opted not to go for the full Bikini Wax.

Speaking of pretty girls, the night-time RN for my floor, Caitin, is cute as well. We spent a big chunk of morning discussing our favorite books. We had a match in several subjects, categories and authors. We're gonna swap Favorite Lists tomorrow. You know I can be a little shy and introverted when it comes to talking with The Opposite Sex, but I think tomorrow night I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna work up the nerve to ask if she'll help with my bedpan.

Yesterday the guy who was drawing my labs (siphoning my blood) turned out to be a Native of Chicago where I was (before I emigrated). He grew up in the South Suburbs and met his future wife in Country Club Hills (where my mom lived before she emigrated).We talked a lot about Pizza, Taverns the appreciation of when you visit the birthplace.

It kinda bums me out that I can't sit upright (well,they won't LET me), that makes it hard to do some of the computer things I'd planned for this week. On the other hand, my abs are getting a good workout.

Next time I need to bring a stenographer to take dictation. Insert your own joke here.

If you are a member of Roy Gene's Secret Society and Inner Circle, you can get updates on my procedures via your Clandestine Code numbers (my mom's phone number) or by saying the password to my son, Alex (RG2 The word is "swordfish") Otherwise, watch this blog.

not resonsible for misspelling, improper word usage, bad punctuation or terrible syntax.. I been sick, y'know?

Media Blackout Soon

2010-05-10T12:08:00.000-07:00

In 20 minutes they are gonna take me down to install my Chemo Direct Liver Link. They call it Intrahepatic Arterial Chemo. Mine's easier to spell. It's up through an artery in the "groinal" area. They stick in a catheter and start a drip. OOPS They're here. Be incommunicado for rest of day.

Roy Gene Master Control Media Center

2010-05-10T08:06:00.000-07:00

Just getting all my equipment installed, both for communications and medical procedures. Got my laptop PC with the WiFi (Thanks Tom Fussell), my Kindle book reader (Thanks Dave Decker), my Camera, MP3 player, noise-canceling headphones, portable Hard Drive(s) and cell phone. Got the cable TV and radio (with DVD player attached).My nightstand drawers contain books, newspapers, magazines and pens.

They got my vitals: dropped 5 lbs already!? Temperature? 98.3! Really-no coaching on my part. Got me an IV installed and dripping. Took a fistful of meds, gave a few vials of blood. Got stuck for a blood sugar test. Talked to the floor nurse, the RN and Social Worker. I had hoped to get names and /or pictures for my entourage, but they tend to appear and disappear quickly. In fact one will usually be talking to me to distract me from the other one who is busy poking me with a sharp object.

As is typical of my hospital visits, I get conflicting information. The first thing I had been told this morning is that I was just staying overnight. Well, I had already been dropped off by Grandbaby Momma, who was on her way back to B/CS. I was waiting to get started here before determining when I'd be leaving. My main Doctor told me last week this would be at least a Mon-Fri ordeal. Luckily, he dropped by to reconfirm the time frame. After they analyze my blood works, They'll wheel me out to get a Chemo Drip direct to my liver.

I don't get to eat until then. I have been NPO (Nothing Per Oral - it's hospital jargon) since midnight. Now it's near noon with nothing to consume but an ounce or two of water to wash down the pills. Supposedly , I will have a "normal" menu and be able to #1 and #2 solo. Well, me and a couple of IV bags.

Not only that, but I feel a nap coming on. I made notes and have other stories to tell, but it will have to wait until I'm semi-coherent again.
I'm Roy Gene, broadcasting? - typing? -TYPECASTING live from the Baylor Medical Center in Dallas

Roy Gene's Health-O-Meter

2010-05-05T10:29:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to post an update to my medical shenanigans, but Facebook and Text messages only leave so many characters and I usually go over those allotted. Maybe it's time to RESURRECT the BLOG! I had been attempting daily updates about Roger & Roy and the morning show until about the time that the in-studio computer failed and is somewhere way down the list of important things to repair or replace.

First off, again, thank you so much to all the neighbors, framily, acquaintances and total strangers who have called or written in the last few day. Here is a synopsis of my situation to date.

A few years back I was recommended to Baylor Hospital in Dallas for transplant on a liver that was not responding to medication. There are certain criteria one must meet before getting on the list. The information collected in 3mo, 6mo and annual intervals make up a "MELD" score, Model for End-Stage Liver Disease. Scores range from 6-40. A score of six indicates the least ill patient and a score of forty indicates the sickest patient. I have been holding around 10-11 for three years.

In that three years I have experienced some episodes, mainly when I started leaking ammonia on the brain and went a little nutty (for those of you listening that morning-a LOT nutty). Anyways all the sudden on last weeks sonogram, they find a tumor. A big one. In fact, because of the size it has become and the speed it occurred , they pronounced it cancer. I went back this past Monday for full range of tests and pictures and secret ray gun analysis.

On Tuesday, they upped my tumor count as a twofer, with a chance that a third one was trying to move into the neighborhood. It was either that or some spice or condiment accidentally spilled onto the picture.

I met with a transplant Doctor and the Oncologist on Tuesday to plan a course of action. Originally the plan was to burn them babies off and put me at the front of the line for transplant. For one reason or another, they couldn't or didn't wanna do this and so alternate therapy was suggested.

Let me interject here to answer the same question I had: Why couldn't they just replace the cancerfied liver with the transplanted one? As long as the Big C was confined to the liver, wouldn't it make more sense to just cut it and flush it?

Turns out that when you have multiple tumors of the size and stature I'm growing, the RECURRENCE of Cancer IN ANOTHER PART OF THE ANATOMY is like 20% greater if you do a transplant. Therefore, they want to shrink the tumors at least just long enough to pronounce them "within limits" and then remove it and sell it on E-Bay.

This is the strategy. Next Monday 5/10/2010 I will go back to Baylor where they will poke a hole and insert a hose to mainline my liver with Chemotherapy for five days in a row. Then unplug and check me; rinse and repeat- if necessary. When they get 'em shrunk down to size I will be placed high atop the transplant list. Then I will be on standby (must arrive within 6 hours) for when one becomes available. Then I will live happily ever after. Unless another organ fails...

Anyway, I will be on the air as much as possible through this ordeal. I'm consulting with our KORA Krack Engineers to see if there is some way I might be be able to do the Morning Show from a remote hook-up in my Dallas hospital room. Maybe our Krack Sales Team will offer Sponsorship packages.

Anyhow, that's all I know for now. I will keep in touch. Watch this space for more information.

And, thanks again for your support, prayers and love

Roy Gene Munse
Legendary Local Broadcaster and Positive Role Model

MAS*H MOMENTS 2009

2009-12-10T10:21:00.000-08:00

Another radioMASH for the archives and history books. Our biggest yet and therefore, our most successful attempt. Over 5,000 Brazos Valley families (not INDIVIDUALS) were serviced in a year that we had every reason to suspect a shortfall. There are, as always, no adequate words to relay our gratitudes. Here are some brief recollections I collected:
For me, the highlight of every year is seeing some of the same staff and personnel that operate this function every year. Not the radio station peoples - they come and go - but rather The Intangibles, Civic, Service and Business organizations (Sam's Club), and just regular folks. It's always good to meet alums who were once on our list and now make contributions to The Toy Drive.Specifically this year I liked talking with the teacher from Bryan High. His students did a "5 for $500" collection, begging, borrowing, just-short-of-stealing change from fellow students through five days worth of lunch periods with a goal of Five Hundred Dollars. Plus they volunteered at the Toy Tent over the weekend. And it was all THEIR idea.
Also this year it was fun for me to be Santa Gene (at least for the kids who weren't scared). Elizabeth Martinez' daughter kept hugging me every time I got in her vicinity. I spent a lot of in-between-break and after-shift time standing on the Mall Hill (The Grassy Knoll as it's known to Conspiracists) waving to and at traffic. Observation: BCS needs to PUT DOWN THE CELL PHONE AND DRIVE.

Saturday, the most climate-friendly of our days, was the best time to be Santa Gene (aka, Tex Kringle), except for the early day cold temperatures when I was buzzing around the heater like a moth to a flame. I was talking with Toy Queen Liz in the KORA tent when she said "Somethings burning". A statement, not a question. It was me. Or my boot, anyhow. My borrowed boot was smoldering and flaming. After quickly extinguishing the Yule Tide Blaze, I began formulating some good story to tell Julie from The Chamber who graciously provided me with the Claus Accouterments. Maybe I'll be buying her a new outfit. Will those be on sale AFTER Christmas?

One last thing: Snow. We've had monsoon rains, wind and ice storms, but I don't think we've ever had SNOW. An estimated 38 flakes fell on the compound Friday and two of the flakes were JUST ALIKE. It could only happen during MASH.

Holidazed and Confused

2009-12-01T10:03:00.000-08:00

Happy December. Right smack in the middle of the official "Holiday Season". Thanksgiving just passed where I did multiple friend/relative visits. I spent time at four feasts and coulda made it to five if my pudding would have hurried up. I have one signature dessert dish that I generally tote to the Holiday gatherings: Sugar Free Banana Pudding. I use the old-fashioned cook and serve pudding (instead of instant), so it takes longer to make, stirring constantly for about an hour. Anyhow, I found these little pastry shells (that were DEFINITELY NOT sugar or carb-free) and filled them with banana, vanilla pudding and low-fat cream cheese. This will surely be on future menus, but it threw off my schedule to go to North Zulch where my friend TOW invites me to dinner every year. One year I shocked her and actually showed up. That was the year she didn't invite me. I was planning to put in a live appearance this year, but for the cook and serve pudding and the fact she lives just outside of Egypt in relation to my other stops. So I hadda make do with a phone call.
Stopped in at The Garrett Ranch for a pre-meal, pre-game pep talk; then to my stepdaughter's house (where we have been main-mealing for several years and she had prepared...sugar free banana pudding! Just for me!), then to Grandbaby Mama's house to visit and pick up RG3, my grandson, and make a final stop at my son's place. The noted chef RG2 wanted to prepare the meal. We had more food than table space and more butts than places to park them. Our radio show friend, David Decker - the Fiddlin' Financier - provided us with pheasant (mind the buck shot). I like when all three Gene Generations get together. And a great time was had by all.

Although next year, I think I'll choose one location to stay throughout the whole day.

Remind me to tell you about the return of the Roy Gene Christmas Light Show, half completed this weekend as well, after a three year lay off.

Up next: Radio M*A*S*H #26 begins Thursday at Post Oak Mall. See ya then and there.

POTPOURRI POSTING

2009-11-17T10:05:00.000-08:00

Been trying to post for many days now but I keep getting sidelined, criss-crossed and just plain distracted. Also I tend to forget more things more oftener. So I not only forgot to post, I forget what my cryptic notes mean.

Anyhow, I say that because I had several really good subjects I was going to write about, but many of them have lost their timeliness and relevance. I've got pages of notes and scraps tucked into my attache case (it's actually a beat-up back-pack, but "attache case" sounds classier) that were going to help remind me of my detoured wit and wisdom, but now I can barely decipher the handwriting - much less the meaning.

So in order to clear my files and conscience, I'll just transfer the information from my notes and that way I won't feel like I've completely abandoned the blog. Feel free to attach any significance you like to any of these thought starters:

Germs
Deer Season - Butch
Butterball hot line now open
Blueberries (it had something to do with dropping them on the floor)
Mideastern
Google is hiring
Red Lights/ Munson (short-lived)
Traffic: Dave and Stop Signs
Texas Constitution
ID for voting
Modern technology
Roger's S Save
Blue Ray/ Internet
Facebookings
Dave South and football delays\Political asylum

Okay, now it all gets downloaded to the trash and I'll start fresh tomorrow. Or when I remember. Now if I can just figure where I stashed the Questions/Answers/Winners of the day.

Trick Or Treat in the Modern Era

2009-11-03T10:26:00.000-08:00

11/2/2009
Went out with RG3 and assorted associated other varmints and parents to Trick or Treat Saturday Night. RG3's given name is Kelan. He was dressed as "Elmo" from Sesame Street. Therefore he became "Kelmo" to me. We tricked or treated in College Station near Grandbaby- Mama's house because (1) It was fertile ground last year and (2) the neighborhood had a Halloween Party nearby in a park where you could play kid-games and such. The problem was with the adults. Due to a lolly-gagging RG2 (my son) our quest didn't even begin until 7pm. The kids only did a couple streets worth and then we returned to find the Carnival In The Park was already over. So, for all that preparation we only got about an hour's worth of treat-time. We were also slowed down by RG3 being scairt at some houses and trying to invite himself into others.
Now, I don't want to go all Cranky Codger and start complaining about "thewaywediditbackinmyday", but I recall making a night of it. We'd go out, fill a bag, come back and dump it, then start again until we'd made several hauls and proceeded to Step 2: sorting. I can't recall any specific Halloween Parties I attended (that doesn't mean they didn't happen - maybe I wasn't invited) and the biggest danger I faced was leaving my booty (in the Pirate sense) unguarded while I went back out. When you have other brothers and sisters who might be pilfering your stash it can lead to accusations, incriminations and retributions.
The point is RG3 did not fetch ONE SINGLE PEANUT BUTTER CUP for all his efforts. Which he had promised to me. He actually had promised 4 pieces for me, but since he couldn't fill my request (no Kit Kats, either) , I absolved him of his obligations. Not counting the ones I stole when he wasn't looking.
The other point is even though I know now how bad all that sugar is for you (I got the teeth to prove it, or DON'T have the teeth) and I keep an active restriction on RG3 when he's with me on a "normal" weekend, Halloween is the one Holiday to go nuts and consume massive amounts of sugar unfettered and uncontested. It just seems to me kids should take more advantage of that.
Next year we start at NOON!

*A couple footnotes: In modern times a slow-roiling fear has set in among the parents of the Little Monsters regarding tainted or poison candy. Did you know there has never been a documented, certified instance of a stranger giving bad treats to a child? Not just here, but Nationwide.The Lone Instance of tampering with candy came from a Father poisoning his OWN son via Pixie Sticks. (Why did have to be in Texas?)
Not to say there ain't crazy, deviated sumbuckets out there. Just they are not in the quantities we're led to believe.

Roger and Roys Halloween Grab Bag

2009-10-30T11:58:00.000-07:00

A few hopefully helpful items for Hollerween:

Maximize Your Candy Haul

It's a great time to be alive because technology is improving almost everything that we do -- including trick-or-treating.
The real estate website Zillow.com now features their first "Trick or Treat Housing Index," which processed all their data to determine the best neighborhoods to maximize candy intake this Saturday.
They awarded points for the price of homes, the population density, how easy it is to walk around these neighborhoods and local crime data. Based on this information, neighborhoods were chosen that provide the most candy, with the least walking -- and minimal safety risks.

How To Keep Kids From Overloading On Candy

While it's virtually impossible for parents to stop their kids from eating candy, there are some ways that parents can get a handle on Halloween so children don't feel deprived -- and they also don't eat so much they get sick:

1. Early decisions with children -- Before the big night out, decide with your kids what is a reasonable amount of candy to eat that night and beyond. You can package the candy in small bags to make the holiday last longer, ration a piece or two a day or even decide to donate or throw some away.
2. Dinner -- Feed your kids dinner before trick or treating so they will not be starving and want to fill up on candy while going from house to house.
3. Allow it -- Do not ban candy or throw it away when the kids aren't looking. This may just make them want it more.
4. Role models -- Parents should be good role models by not eating all the candy themselves.
5. Emphasize fun -- Take some emphasis off candy by focusing on the fun of the holiday, like checking out the costumes and decorated houses.
6. Walk -- When trick-or-treating, walk, don't drive, to get some physical activity in while candy collecting.
7. Patience -- Suggest kids wait to eat candy until they get home, where parents can inspect the wrappers to ensure they're tightly sealed.

Cut Your Candy Consumption

You should keep empty wrappers in plain sight while eating your Halloween candy.
Brian Wansink, author of Mindless Eating: Why We Eat More Than We Think, said that study participants ate almost half as many mini-size Halloween candies when they kept the wrappers in sight.
"Having a visual reminder of how much you ate, keeps you honest and eating less," Wansink said. "Your stomach can't count but your eyes can when they seen the empty wrappers."
Wansink also advised that instead of putting out a bowl of Halloween candy on an office desk at work or at home next to the sofa, it should be placed across the room because people will eat less if they have to get up and walk.

Tips for a Healthier Halloween

Mountains of Halloween candy have been on store shelves for weeks -- and there's no end in sight. There will be candy at every turn for us and our kids until Thanksgiving.
Focus on a few simple tips to get through it all without going into sugar shock.

1. Halloween is One Day -- Make the holiday just one day. Treat yourself without guilt. Enjoy the candy and festivities. Then, put it all behind you.
2. Move -- Have fun on Halloween by including physical activity. Walk, bike or play active games at parties.
3. Replace the Rewards -- Even though there will be plenty of candy everywhere, don't use it as a reward for doing chores and getting good grades. Instead, offer a game or toy they want.
4. One or Two Pieces -- Instead of following the suggested (large) serving size for bags of candy, take one or two pieces and savor them.

HERE ARE FIVE TIPS TO KEEP YOUR KIDS FROM GETTING SWINE FLU ON HALLOWEEN:

Earlier this month, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention estimated that as many as ONE in FIVE American children had experienced flu-like symptoms.
--That means there's a good chance that tomorrow, you and your kids are going to come into contact with dozens of grubby little trick-or-treaters.
--Here are some tips on Halloween Swine flu prevention.

#1.) Only buy costumes that come wrapped in plastic, and fully sanitize all masks.
#2.) Bring hand sanitizer trick-or-treating, and use it between houses.
#3.) Make sure your kids wash their hands before eating any candy.
#4.) If you're at home passing out candy, make sure you distribute it on your own instead of letting kids reach into the bowl.
#5.) And if you're not feeling well Saturday, DON'T go trick-or-treating and DON'T pass out candy.

YOU CAN INSTALL A SURVEILLANCE CAMERA IN YOUR JACK-O-LANTERN TO CATCH VANDALS:

Every Halloween, the juvenile delinquent punks go around smashing pumpkins, egging houses, and throwing toilet paper on trees.
--If you're sick of it, you can put a mini surveillance camera inside one of your jack-o-lanterns. It's called the Avaak Vue, and it lets you monitor your property over a wireless connection.
--So if anyone try to deface your yard or your house, you'll know they're coming . . . and you'll be ready.

There's Candy ... And Then There's Bad Candy

If dentists were ruling the world, the only candy that would be given out this year for trick-or-treating would be sugarless gum.
Lucky for kids, dentists don't rule the world, but they still have an opinion on what candy is more and less harmful to your teeth. They recommend choosing things that melt away and disappear in a short period.
With this thinking, chocolate is actually a good choice -- as long as you brush your teeth right after eating it.

On the other hand, hard candies and lollipops are the worse because they take the longest to dissolve, leaving sugar in your mouth for the longest time.

Worst Halloween Candy

Every Halloween, kids fill up their trick-or-treat bags with loads of candy. We take the bags home and chow down until we're left with the undesirables.
The Huffington Post compiled a list of the "Grossest Kinds of Candy No Adult Should Give Out on Halloween."
Each one is up for debate, but their list is as follows:

Wax bottle candy
Pumpkin-shaped candy corn
Necco Wafers
Fruit-flavored Tootsie Rolls
Circus Peanuts
Bit-O-Honey
Dad's Root Beer Barrels
Gum Drops
Individually wrapped Sesame Crunch

WOULD YOU HAND OUT BACON-FLAVORED GUMBALLS FOR HALLOWEEN?

Halloween, you can hand out "regular" candy just like everyone else. Or you can break the mold and pass out some "less traditional" Halloween treats.
--Bacon-flavored gumballs . . .
--Garlic mints . . .
--Zit Poppers, which are oversized acne bumps filled with candy pus . . .
--Human Dog Food, which is candy kibble in a mini bowl . . .
--And Scorpion Pops, which are just like regular lollipops, only they have a dead scorpion in the center.

INTRODUCING MEAT HANDS . . .
THE BEST HALLOWEEN-THEMED MEAL EVER:

Before you take the kids out trick-or-treating, you might want to feed them a delicious, Halloween-themed meal. Like a big plateful of Meat Hands. And as gruesome as the name makes it sound, it's really just meatloaf that's been shaped to look like a severed hand . . . complete with onion slices for the wrist bone and fingernails.

Tips For Leftovers

Once Halloween's over, are you going to have Halloween candy and decorations lying around till Christmas? Follow these tips from Real Simple magazine for re-using your Halloween stuff:

1. Make fun desserts. Melt some of those candy bars down for chocolate-covered strawberries or use peppermint patties or Snickers bars for brownies (stick the candy in between two layers of the mix before baking).
2. Stock up on baking supplies. Chop leftover chocolate or candy corn and use them instead of chocolate chips in cookie recipes.
3. Make a seasonal centerpiece. Cut off the top of a pumpkin and scoop out the seeds. Arrange fresh or dried flowers in a vase and place it inside.
4. Make soup. While your Jack-o'-Lantern is still fresh, peel and cut it into cubes to make a yummy base for a savory pumpkin soup or other fall favorite.

Beautiful People

2009-10-30T10:23:00.000-07:00

WEDNESDAY 10/28/2009

A couple items about the more physically blessed among us. Now there's a new dating site exclusively for good-looking specimens. It's called "Beautiful People" (surprise!). In order to help restrict the Ugly from Beautiful events, you must submit a photo of yourself before you'll be accepted as a member. Only after the site's existing members have deemed you "attractive enough" are you allowed to set up a profile. According to the site's managing director, "There's nothing shallow in wanting to be with someone you're attracted to . . . People are fed up wasting time and money meeting unattractive people on the net."

--Overall, BeautifulPeople.com has about 180,000 members . . . but about five times that number have applied for membership and been DENIED for being too ugly. If you'd like to see how you fare, click the picture of Roger and Roy we submitted...

Speaking of Good-Looking People, "Country Weekly" magazine asked their readers to vote for Country Music's Most Beautiful Woman . . . and they chose, for the second year in a row, KELLIE PICKLER. Here's the Top 10:

#1.) KELLIE PICKLER

#2.) REBA MCENTIRE

#3.) CARRIE UNDERWOOD

#4.) WHITNEY DUNCAN (--She was a finalist on "Nashville Star" in 2007.)

#5.) SHANIA TWAIN

#6.) DANIELLE PECK

#7.) DOLLY PARTON

#8.) MARTINA MCBRIDE

#9.) FAITH HILL

#10.) JULIANNE HOUGH

Okay, far be it for me to criticize anyone for talent or physical appearance, but Whitney Duncan? Isn't one of the guidelines Beautiful Women in Country Music? What does she sing? And where? When?
Shania has been out of the spotlight for years, Dolly has been under the spotlights too long and what kind of list wouldn't include Alison Krauss?

I rest my case

Scaredy Bears

2009-10-28T10:43:00.000-07:00

Tuesday 10/27/2009
Over the weekend I attended a kid's birthday/Halloween Party. RG3 was one of the kids present.
As you may recall from earlier tales, I introduced The Boy to The Classics, including the Disney Winnie-The-Pooh (original movies from the 60's). When we get together to play he tells me he's WtP, while I take the coveted role of Tigger (sometime Grandma is Kanga, sometimes she's excluded from the 100 Acre Woods). I thought we'd make a good double costume this year. Except I couldn't find Pooh and Tigger in any of the Mega Stores, Grocery Stores or Discount/ 2nd Hand Shops. I even tried online to no real avail. I found some costumes but none with the justification for price. Most of the good ones were rentals (already rented), and the more "affordable" ones looked like crap. So, I was forced to wear my scary hooded spook get-up. Those of you with glasses know how difficult dressing for Halloween can be, you can't wear a mask or you risk virtually blindness without your lenses, and you can't wear your specs on the outside because (mostly) that just looks stupid. Who's going to fear a wolfman in bifocals? So, anyhow, a few years back I got this red hooded thing that has a black screen-like face covering. You can see out, but not so easily in (pictures included here display partial face due to the idiosyncrasies of camera shots). The problem is that RG3 was TERRIFIED of me (even when I opened the hatch and showed him my real face) and took about an hour before he felt confident enough to get with-in arms reach. It's not fair. I didn't panic over HIS Elmo costume. Anyhow, we're all primed and ready to hit the Halloween circuit this Saturday. I don't think RG3 will let me wear the hood, though...

Killin' Time

2009-10-28T10:05:00.000-07:00

MONDAY 10/26/2009

Why is it with all our modern technology my alarm clock doesn't know that Daylight Savings Time begins a week later than it used to. This is the same clock that won't let me set it a few minutes ahead for wake-up purposes, but always re-corrects itself. If it's set to sync with the big Greenwich Mean Time Prime Meridian via Atomic Clock that measures absolute accurate time. But still doesn't know diddly squat about Daylight Savings. Luckily that's the only clock in the house that screwed up the time over the weekend. THE MOST IMPORTANT CLOCK IN MY HOUSE! Anyhow, perhaps this is another sign that the United States Congress should not be messing with time in the first place. There is virtually nothing the Guvmint can do that The Market or God can't do better.

Evidently, the "anti-gravity broom" story has spread far and wide. Wide enough for Joe Ross, a professor of astronomy and physics at Texas A&M to debunk it. As you recall from some of our previous episodes, listeners had told us of the mysterious phenomenon of brooms standing upright on their bristles solo without the benefit of anchor. Speculation was that it was planet alignment, gravity fluctuations or Black Magic. Cassie Smith from the Bryan College Station Eagle newspaper gets the real story here.

It's All Your Vault

2009-10-23T10:12:00.000-07:00

This morning on the Roger and Roy Show, we were trying to play a Friday round of "If We Got It, You Got It" request time. The songs asked for are usually kind of goofy and usually several decades old. Today we had a request for "Bird of Paradise" by Little Jimmy Dickens. It wasn't much a surprise to discover that was not in the vault. It was a matter of concern that we didn't have "Fraulein" or "Good Night Irene"! Now, before you jump to unnecessary conclusions and accuse us of lax security at our oldies collection at best or not being Good Texans at the worst, remember the modern technology we have to work with, without and around. I'm sure 47 years ago when we were first broadcasting we had pristine, fresh, newly minted editions of those songs. But they were recorded to vinyl 45rpm records or maybe 78s(ask your grandpa). Since then we've converted to tape, CDs and -now - computers and hard drives. Each time the library needs to be transferred and updated. Invariably some songs get lost in the transition. Both Roger and I have held the mantel of KORA "Music Director" at one time or another, so we each blame the other for any holes in the inventory. Today we decided to call a truce. We will no longer accuse one another for missing music. Now it's all Chris Austin's fault.

A Morning Show Pie in the Sky is awarded to kid's broadcaster Soupy Sales who died at age 83 in New Jersey after a long illness. Maybe U-Tube will have some clips of him in his hey-day in the 50s and 60s. For a time he was the goofiest guy on TV (click photo for links)

Laws of Gravity Ruled Unconstitutional

2009-10-22T06:57:00.000-07:00

Is it the alignment of the planets? Sign of the Apocalypse? Standard paranormal activity? What is causing/allowing brooms to stand on their bristles without falling over? And why is it making news just now? This morning Butch From Maaco described the phenomenon to us after Chrissy, his office manager, claimed she had a broom in the closet exhibiting the gravity and logic defying antic. Butch was leery, but checked for himself and discovered it was true. He even put it in a different spot (near the front door) to make sure he wasn't being hoodwinked and/or bamboozled. Now, assured that the feat is true, he's considering buying some Dollar Store cheapies and selling "Magic Brooms" for $10 bucks along with his standard paint and body business. Roger says he was told a few days ago that it's due to a fluctuation in gravity caused by the way the stars and planets and moons and meteors and black holes and supernovas and galaxies all line up. Another listener called to confirm the confirmation and even send photographic proof:

(actual unedited, unretouched photos from actual local listener)

My curiosity piqued, my BS detector flashing (and my Spiedy Sense tingling), I did some Internet Research (the most accurate kind) and found this CNN video posted on Brietbart.TV direct from Prattville. Be sure to read the comments, too.

In addition, there's this Scientific Discovery about eclipses and gravity.

What can we conclude from today's information on and in the Roger and Roy Morning Show? If you're ever caught in an eclipse holding a broom, grab something well anchored immediately!
You're welcome.....

Early Rodeo Warning

2009-10-21T05:48:00.000-07:00

Yesterday the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo (not RodeoHouston?!?) sent us a press release warning and informing us of some early bookings for next year's performances. Tim McGraw, Brad Paisley and Brooks & Dunn are all scheduled to appear. I believe, but couldn't testify to the fact, that this is the earliest we've ever had and heard of musical bookings for the next year. Brooks & Dunn are an obvious choice having played the show many times previously and will be traveling across America on their "Last Rodeo Tour" and appearing together for the final time (not only at The Rodeo, but every venue they play). They will close out the shows on Saturday, March 20, 2010. Some ticket packages are on sale now. The full Rodeo line-up will be released January 11, 2010. Oh, yeah, for your screaming pre-teens and tweens The Jonas Brothers are on the roster, too.

Halloween is fast approaching and you're still unsure of what your costume will be. As a public service, The Roger & Roy Morning Show offer these suggestions:

Inappropriate Halloween Costumes

Or if you don't think you have enough time untill the Holidays, you can find your plain unimaginative outfit at

The Unoriginal Halloween Costume Shoppe.

Cell Uncertainty

2009-10-20T07:00:00.000-07:00

Modern Technology has provided us with many electronic gizmos to help make life "easier". None more ubiquitous as the wireless cell phone. Most people have at least one and many of us have ditched the land line altogether. It definitely cuts down the number of "junk" calls (although I notice my creditors seem to have no problem finding it) and it's handy and convenient. Still, for me, it is not without certain drawbacks. Like if I have pants that don't contain a phone pocket and I stash it in the regular chamber I'm in danger of making a "Pocket Call" when I walk around. Or if I park it in my back pack which contains all my valuable and invaluable Roger & Roy Show Preparation Stuff, I'll forget to take it out and it ends up hidden in my Computer Room or elsewhere in the house, muffled. Or I'll leave it in the car. Some mornings I can't find it at all, which is my latest conundrum. Last week I was going about my usual early morning routine before waking the rooster and heading to the studios when I couldn't find my phone. I checked all the usual suspect places several times over and came up with nothing. Then I had a great idea: I'd just call my cell phone from another phone and trace the ring. Except, of course, I didn't have another cell or another land line to call my phone and it was too early to go knocking on doors. So I left the house unarmed, phone free. It was a personal and professional struggle, but I made it to afternoon without it, and then, when I got home, I had a friend keep calling my number over and over until I answered. It took several attempts, but I finally I traced the source to between the cushions of my couch. Actually, stuck in the no man's land beneath the recliner portion of the sofa. Now reunited, I swore I'd never sit and recline with my cell in my pocket ever again. This morning I heard the cell phone alarm (I use a regular alarm clock -minimum two snooze delays - and the cell as a back up in another room) and it sounded a bit muffled. Now if I had any sense, I woulda sat up bolt right in bed and run to the source of the suspicious sound. But, since I don't really have that much sense - especially at that time of day, I nodded off again. And, naturally, when it came time to leave I couldn't track down the cell phone. I heard it earlier, so I knew it was there. But-where? Yup. Beneath the recliner cushion again. I think it's crawling up there all by itself late at night. Maybe there's a nest of them there. Hope so. That way when they mature I'll be able to have a spare phone to call my main phone when I've lost misplaced it. Unless I lose that, too.

...Meanwhile, It's Suddenly Monday

2009-10-19T09:58:00.000-07:00

Had a great weekend. Picked up RG3 on Friday and had him all weekend. Saturday was chock-full of great stuff to do and places to play. We got to as many as possible. We went to the Animal Shelter's Wiener Races at Wolf Pen Creek. I had no idea there were so many dachshund canines and sympathisers in the Brazos Valley. Many of the dogs in attendance dressed for Halloween. Big crowd, beautiful weather. We had to leave before the first heat of races (perhaps "heat" is not a good choice of words) to get over to Lowes for our ant-less picnic and radio broadcast where we could see some of the aerial acrobatics at the Colter Field Air Show right for the Bar B Q rig. At some point RG3 went from being my Roadie to Assistant Cook to sit-down/lay-down protester. He perched himself on the floor of the KORA Kooker blocking ingress and egress. Yes, it was nap time. For both of us, but he's the only one who actually got to sleep. So while the limo carried him away to Dreamland, I remained dreaming with my eyes wide open.

Sunday, after seeing the Mighty Houston Texans finally secure a viable win versus a decent team, I got out to cut the grass at last. It's not that I was avoiding it- not completely, anyway- but for some reason, Old Dependable, my vintage lawnmower wouldn't start. Even though I had done extensive repairs and reconditioning to it (changed the spark plug and added fresh gas). Luckily, George Weber of our Ace KORA Engineering Staff lives next door to me and offered the use of his mower. RG3 was to be my Helper for that job, as well. Except for one problem: he's scairt of the lawnmower. The boy is 2.5 years old and used to be fearless. A little too fearless sometimes, but now he's afraid of the lawnmower, the vacuum cleaner, occasionally the shower and a stuffed plush Winnie-The-Pooh toy. He loves the cartoon, is terrified of the tubby little cubby all stuffed with fluff. Silly old boy. It occurs to me this just be may be a way to avoid doing work around the house as he gets older. Well, that still doesn't really explain the bear...

I swear we weren't outside five minutes before being feasted on by wild 'skeeters. The recent rains have produced a plethora, not to mention a whole bunch, of those bloodsuckers. But they were out early. I thought dusk was Prime Time for Mosquitoes. This was right around 3 o'clock. And they've become more persistent. In fact, for the second weekend in a row those vampires have followed us into the car and continued the assault as we attempted to escape down the highway. Maybe these are the special African Aggressive "Killer" Mosquito breed.
Remember the old days when bugs were just pests and not potential carriers of West Nile virus?

Word From The Herd

2009-10-14T10:36:00.000-07:00

After yesterdays controversies about Roger Miller/ Short Songs/ Classic Country Music, most everyone in the studio (Roger and Me) was happy to hear that I found "You Can't Roller Skate In A Buffalo Herd" in my own personal archive at home. We aired it in place of "Chug-A-Lug" this morning. The reception from our listeners was decidedly mixed with respondents being clearly in one camp or the other. Of the naysayers, one female listener said "I'm old, but I'm not that old" alluding to the fact that Roger Miller's heyday was the 1960's. Or, so I'm told. I'm much to young to remember it personally. Anyhow, stay tuned to this blog for further developments...

Carrie Underwood is hosting (hostessing?) a TV special December 7th on the FOX Network, performing songs from her soon-to-be-released CD "Play On" plus previous hits and - it being the season- Holiday Classics (Walking in a Winter Under-wood?). Taping will be October 22nd-23rd and you might be able to attend the taping. Click for details OCATV.com

Now Playing: Your Favorite Song (over and over)

2009-10-13T07:32:00.000-07:00

I knew it would come to this eventually: we've been caught! As regular listeners to Roger & Roy know, we have a tendency to play "Chug-A-Lug" by Roger Miller around the same time near every morning. Okay, every morning. There is a reason for that. As Roger collects News, Sports, Weather and What Have You for the day's public performances, sometimes we'll need an extra minute or two to prepare and we'll insert a "short song" from our vast voluminous ginormous music library. At some point Chug-a-Lug became the perfect "fill" song and we were inserting it about once a week. Over a period of time, it became more and more frequent until it became a daily occurrence and a little private joke between Roger and Me. Then we were curious to see how long it would go until someone called us on it.
I gotta admit, it took longer than I thought it would, but today we were exposed! By a listener! A LOYAL Listener who, none-the-less threatened to pull the plug and/or spin the dial on the whole Morning Show Scam if we did not cease and desist.

Anyway, we took an oath and made a solemn promise to our concerned listeners that we would try harder to mix it up in the future. And much like Dez Bryant (the suspended receiver from Oklahoma State), we're very, very, very, very, very, very sorry this whole thing happened. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Very. Like David Letterman, we plead for your forgiveness. And, like Roger & Roy, we're pro'ly gonna do it again.

Sorry.

Miley, Marge and Oprah

2009-10-12T07:08:00.000-07:00

Three of our favorite famous females making headlines this weekend:

Miley Cyrus has decided to be a Twitter Quitter. After having amassed one of the largest group of micro-blogging followers, she has decided she needs her privacy. At least that's what she wrote on a lengthy Internet Blog on her website (Do we assume she will still maintain her web-pages?). Click on pic for vid.

Marge Simpson in Playboy!
As reported last week by the Roger and Roy Morning Show (you can never tell when we're not making this stuff up), the Blue-Haired beauty will be a cover girl in the November issue. She'll be featured in a "three-page pictorial" inside the issue. The issue should be out sometime this week. What will Homer and the kids think?

Last Time Oprah was in Texas I think she was battling some cattlemen about beef defamation. Now this weekend she was at The Sate Fair of Texas with entourage and security detail in tow. Ain't nobody gonna get that Corny Dog away from her.

Roger and Roy Explain Modern Electronics

2009-10-07T06:43:00.000-07:00

So, a listener we'll call "Ed" (because that is his real name) calls yesterday and inquires about KORA on the iPhone and iPod. We've been promoting this ervice for several months. But Ed says he's having a hard time finding the app (tech talk for "application") and could we help? Well, as it tuns out, neither Roger nor Roy has one of them iPhones and neither Roger nor Roy knows much about cell phone technology in general, except how to dial and receive calls on them (I also know how to text - but not much more). After exhaustive research and some eye-rolling/condescending conversations with one of our younger staff, I am told you go to the "iTunes Store" on your phone and search for "Radiolicious" and follow instructions from there. Now you should be able to listen to Roger and Roy anywhere in the Free World and several repressive regimes, as well. If not, get a teenager to help you.

So, we were running down a list of birthdays and special occasions for this date including the birthdays of Taylor Hicks and Simon Cowell when Roger mentioned the anniversary of Edgar Allan Poe's death in Baltimore (that's how the football team got the name "Ravens" - another story for another time). I, making innocent conversation, asked if there wasn't some mysterious stranger involved in an annual grave site ritual for Poe. That's when my co-worker, co-host and co-dependent Roger Garrett rudely cut me off. For those who are interested, here's the Poe low-down: Since 1949, a man dressed in black, wearing a fedora and scarf to cover his face, visits Poe’s grave on Poe’s birth date (not his death date as I had thought). Every year, he has left three red roses and a bottle of cognac. No one knows the significance of these gifts. One year, he left an unsigned note to let Poe know he has not forgotten him. A photographer took a picture of him. Life magazine published the snapshot, although I can't find it archived online.

Read more: Click the grave

We talked the other day about signs that a woman may be "high maintenance" include having a dog that'll fit in her purse. Here is a picture of Carrie Underwood. Make your own decision.

That's Ace with Carrie. Ace goes everywhere she does. He has his own fan club, Twitter account and MySpace page.

Lee Ann Womack has a new online club you can join. You're eligible for advance concert information, meet and greets and other stuff, but you have to follow a few simple rules and guidelines:

The following video is rated PG-13 by Jennifer Nettles of Sugarland:

The Game of The Century!

2009-10-06T07:11:00.000-07:00

Stayed up way too late last night to see the Packers-Vikings game. It turned out to be everything it was billed to be. I used to like Bret Favre - "fan" would be too strong a term - and how he was able to go so many consecutive starts and all those other records we were constantly being reminded of all night long. But when he did the retirement waffles, I kinda got tired of him. My problem last night was I don't like either of those teams. As you know, a good true football fan will find something on one team or another to identify with, even if it's only temporarily. Like, I could root for the Vikings because of Adrian Peterson, born in Palestine - and site of my first Texas radio job (we just overlook the Oklahoma part of his resume). Or I could root for The Pack, just as a comeuppance to Favre. Either way, it's kinda like rooting for Texas. I just can't do it under any circumstances. Besides, I hope Da Bears whip 'em both. But that was a great game, even with the inevitable idiotic questions asked by the field reporters after the game ("How does it feel?" "Was it a REVENGE game?", "Blah,blah and blah"). The NFL Commissioner should ban any interviews right after the game. The guys don't get a chance to savor the victory themselves before being asked to share their "feelings". Other than that I have no strong feelings one way or the other.

Today we learned the best thing you can take to prevent Swine Flu (or H1N1 as it has been more politically correctly renamed) is...water. Well, okay, maybe the best thing you could take is vaccine, but that's not available right now nor as easily accessible.

Congratulations to Janice Cochran, the latest winner of $98.30 and chance to go to the CMA Awards show in Nashville in November where our Grand Prize Winner will get preferred seating right behind the tall, fat guy in the cowboy hat!

Random Monday Morning Musings

2009-10-05T06:05:00.000-07:00

I like a rainy weekend. Especially during Football Season. Then I don't have to feel guilty about not going outside to play. Even tho I really needed to mow the lawn. I hadn't trimmed it since the Rains returned. I had RG3 with me this weekend and we sat on the back porch watching the rain until we both hit "nap" mode.

Bad weekend for Aggies,Cowboys and Vikings. Good weekend for Texans and Tigers.

Did Roger really "shush" me before and on the air when I was right in the middle of a story? I think he did!

Someday you'll hear the discussion that goes into the creation and selection of our Question Of The Day. It isn't pretty.

Thanks to Ranger Lindsey from Somerville State Park who dropped by to tell us of a program they are conducting to help families learn how to camp. Lindsey took her first time on radio and first contact with Roger & Roy like a Trooper. Or Ranger. She played along with our silliness but Roger thinks when she was through, she was happy to go and had about enough of us as she wanted. We have that effect on peoples.

Roger & Roy + 8

2009-10-02T04:34:00.000-07:00

The Roger and Roy Morning Show Editorial Board wonder if it's possible to send your signs through spell-check before you print them up.
It's a bad influence on your children when you not only misspell "penalty", but your own name.

Lots of Umlauts

2009-10-02T04:08:00.000-07:00

When Hawaii played football with La Tech ESPN kept putting an apostrophe between the "i"s. We couldn't figger if it was accidental, intentional or some misspelling we've all been making all these years. Or a new emoticon? At any rate, trying to stay on the leading path of the cutting edge we3 have decided to spell Roger and Roy with umlauts over the "o"s. If you didn't know, umlauts are those two dots that appear above some words. Generally German words. The translation of "umlaut" as close as we can get it to English means : "two dots for no apparent reason".

Winners and Losers

2009-09-29T11:07:00.000-07:00

Finally, The Dallas Cowboys of Arlington have notched a win in their new palatial Jerry's World stadium (retail price 1.1 billion dollars). Good thing,too. It looked like all the plastic in Mr Jones face was about to melt and turn into a permanent skull-like grimace. I'd have hated to be anyone in his employ or immediate vicinity had the 'boys not pulled through in the second half. I think he might have fired some people today just to relieve the pressure and stay in practice.
Some additional facts about the 9th Wonder of the World: last week I wondered why they'd spend so much money on a new facility - with retractable roof and all - and then lay down artificial turf! Maybe there's been giant leaps in turf technology since I last researched it, but last I heard fake grass is not good for knees and other bendy things. Turns out they have THREE carpets for the field: one for for football, one for soccer, and one for concerts. Already pre-measured and pre-marked. Plus, I'm told, the logos and lettering are not sprayed on the surface but, rather, woven into it. They unroll and roll-up the turf before and after every event. I like the Arizona Cardinals playing field in Phoenix: it's real grass on a giant, movable flat bed that they drag out into the sunshine to maintain. No matter how much the Cowboys have spent on the total package, that "grass" amounts to an inch and a half of plastic on top of cement. Ouch.

Thanks to "Peaches" our clandestine waitress (not her real name) who gave the Roger and Roy Show some of the insider information during our "Good Advice" segment.
Today's Topic: SOME DO'S AND DON'TS IF YOU WANT TO ASK OUT A HOT WAITRESS:

You're out at a bar or a restaurant when a hot waitress comes up to take your order. You want to ask her out, but you can't think of anything to say. So you blurt out something stupid . . or say nothing at all.

The "DO"s:
#1.) Treat her like a real person: Your waitress has heard every line in the book, and she's fully prepared to brush off your cheesy come-on without a second thought.
#2.) Remember she's working: You may be off the clock, but she's not. So don't monopolize her attention and act like she has all the time in the world, because she DOESN'T.
#3.) Bring a few friends along: If you're flying solo, you run the risk of coming across as a creepy loner. Bringing along a few friends goes a long way, especially if there are one or two women in the group. If there is a woman in your group, it's probably not a good idea for her to be your wife or girlfriend. And, it goes without saying, never bring both!
#4.) Talk to her in private: It's not cool to put your waitress on the spot and ask her out in front of your friends. Besides, you may end up embarrassed. Before you talk to her, try excusing yourself from the group or lingering for a few minutes after everyone else leaves.

The "DON'T"s
#1.) Leave an excessively large tip: Why? Because it'll make her feel like you expect something in return . . .("Peaches" doesn't necessarily dismiss big tipping completely, but only as a reward for services or To Insure Promptness))
#2.) Leave a bad tip if she turns you down: That's just weak. She did her job, and it's not her fault you're a loser.
#3.) Brag about your job: The only person who cares about how "cool" your job is, and how much money you make, is YOU.
#4.) Mistake customer service for flirtation: It's her JOB to be polite to you. That's it. Don't assume that just because she "laughs" at your lame jokes, she's attracted.

"Peaches" also reports that she has seated two guys together who order similar items and get equal service and they'll leave two wildly different tips. And phone numbers. Do girls actually call back when a man leaves a number? I thought that only worked the other way around.

Do not look at this picture

The Prime Minister of Spain and his goth-styled teenaged daughters are shown in an image posted by the State Department. According to the laws of Spain, that's against the law. You can't display the images of the Prime Kids. Wonder what they thought was happening when the cameraman got them to pose with the Obamas?

Today's Smile:(click)

GIANT SQUID ATTACKS GULF COAST!

2009-09-24T06:17:00.000-07:00

I don't know why this is just becoming public now, when the event occurred July 30. Perhaps a government cover-up? Even Roger Garrett, our insipid reporter and News Director has neglected to investigate. But now the Morning Show Blog blows the lid off it.
US government scientists caught the first giant squid ever recorded in the US Gulf of Mexico during a research trip.
The whopper was caught in a net by researchers from the US Minerals Management Service (MMS) and the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) who were looking at prey available for sperm whales in the area.
Measuring almost 20 feet long and weighing more than 100 pounds, the squid was caught in more than 1500 feet of water in a special trawl net pulled by the NOAA vessel Gordon Gunter. The giant squid is at the Smithsonian Institution National Museum of Natural History for further study. At least the first of the giant squids. I think it will be the beginning of a wave of oversize cephalopods that will invade our coast and crush our boats in their slimy tentacles. Eventually adapting to operate on land where they will overrun our cities and enslave our human population. It's just a hunch.

Big Roger and Roy "Thank You"s go out to the Kurten Community. We were out to visit during the annual Fall Festival at the Kurten Komplex Multi-use Pavilion and Sports Arena - aka "Kurten Community Center" - on Highway 21 (well just off 21, now) last weekend.
We are always treated great and offered exceptional hospitality whenever we go to Kurten. Plus, we get to visit some longtime listeners and RnR fans, new and old. My grandson RG3 successfully defended his title as "The Only Kid I Know Of That Can Nap In A Bouncy House Even While Other Kids Are Jumping". Unfortunately, no trophy or ribbon was awarded. I saw some of the home-made recipes and baked goods for sale in the Country Store Area and was intrigued by "Monkey Bread" or "Monkey Paw Bread" or something similar. Is one of the ingredients really monkey? If so, where do they get 'em? Can you buy 'em at the store? If they are locally produced, it seems like you wouldn't be able to make more than one or two a year. Another story for Roger to look into?

We learned today that Country Sweetheart Miranda Lambert carries a knife on stage with her. It's not a stalker problem, or a security concern. It's beach balls. 'Ran says that when she was out with Kenny Chesney on tour, she got smacked full in the face with one of them giant balloons the audience tosses around. She was right in the middle of "Gunpowder and Lead" and was miffed- to say the least. She took that big ole ball and deflated it under her heel. Since then she keeps a knife on the drum riser during all live appearances. I'd say even if you're not tossing a beach ball, I wouldn't try to rush a stage she's on. Think of what may have happened to Kanye if it was Miranda instead of Taylor at the VMA's.

ANOTHER PUBLIC SERVICE MESSAGE
"Save the boob" is the tag line on one irreverent video in a campaign for breast cancer awareness that's drawing fans and complaints. Designers of the public service announcements are trying to grab the attention younger women, and encourage them to do breast self-exams. A spokeswoman for Rethink Breast Cancer tells ABC News. "We're creating a bold way of communicating the message". But one viewer called the ads offensive. They "look like a Victoria's Secret ad".

Seperated at Birth?

2009-09-23T04:43:00.000-07:00

As you know, Roger wears many hats in the production of the Roger and Roy Morning Show. As the director and only staff member of our news department, he researches the local news, the state news, the national news, and even World News. (For our Sports department, Roger has a staff of one - Royce Hickman - but that's only 7-9a Thursdays)
That's why recently Roger made the stunning discovery that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad bears a striking resemblance to... Barney Rubble! That's right Fred's close buddy may also be a Mid-East dictator! Here's a side-by-side comparison. Make your own determination. It may all be a hoax, but- think of it- have you ever seen the two of them together at the same time in the same room?

College Station City Council and CS-ISD are trying figure out who and how to pay for "No Cell Phone Use" signs in school zones. National guidelines insist warning signs must be posted before authorities can enforce new laws banning phone usage in school areas (this is for drivers, not students - but that's another story for another day). But there's a problem: It will cost $10,000 - $50,000 to manufacture and install the 50-odd signs needed (if the additional messages are posted on existing speed limit sign poles, it will cost 10k for below and 50k for above the speed numbers). Guess what? Neither one wants to have to pay for them. So, it's back to the Transportation Committee to "revisit" and "recommend" a solution. The KORA Morning Show thinks we should get the schools involved and have students make colorful cardboard signs during art classes.

Alan Jackson's House is for sale! Look what you can get for just 38 million dollars (a steal in these difficult economic times)

Finally, some guys from an organization called "Dude Perfect" have posted a video purporting to show The World's Longest Basketball Shot. It was made at Kyle Field (what, not Reed?). They say they are awaiting confirmation from Guinness to make the claim official. Jordan Meserole from the Chamber of Commerce was visiting this morning and said he could verify the feat, as he was a camera operator at KBTX and was present when the shot was accomplished.

The End of Summer Time

2009-09-22T08:16:00.000-07:00

Another morning of rainy day fun with Roger and Roy. Forecast predicting more moisture all this week. It's still a pleasant surprise to wake up to thunder-boomers after the Long Hot Summer, although -as I've mentioned before - I'd rather sleep during the storms, than wake up with them. I hit the snooze button several times this morning. Which brings me to today's Roger and Roy Free Advice segment (it's worth nothing, that's why we give it for free).

FOUR WAYS TO MAKE SURE YOU'RE NEVER LATE:
#1.) MAKE IT WORTH YOUR WHILE. Ask yourself: "What will I gain by getting there on time?" Will you beat traffic? Will you make progress towards getting a raise? We decided to nullify this suggestion. Please proceed to the next tip.

#2.) STOP DOING "ONE MORE THING." A lot of people are late because they always try to do "one more thing" before they leave the house . . . just when you have your routine down to the minute (the last minute, usually) you stop and decide to mow the lawn or clean the gutters.

#3.) DON'T MESS WITH YOUR CLOCK. Have you ever set your clock ahead ten minutes to force yourself to be on time? Roger says it doesn't work. I, on the other hand, have employed this strategy for years. Maybe it's because I get up so early and I'm still groggy. Or maybe I'm just easily fooled.
In any event, these new-fangled clocks foil me because they automatically update and you can't set 'em to the wrong time.

#4.) PLAN TO BE EARLY. Some people would rather sprint to their gate at the airport than get there an hour early and wait. And if they ARE ever early, they kill time by reading magazines or playing cell phone games . . . when they should be killing time in the lounge (pilots excluded from this suggestion).

***

Congratulation to Butch Eustace (Butch From Maaco) and the KORA Golf Team : Butch, Alan Bingham, Larry Haygood, and Justin who claimed the title of number one radio station in the B/CS Chamber of Commerce Golf Tournament yesterday. You're number one Morning Show was pleased to discover we had a golf team.

***

We were informed during today's Question of The Day that our question had been hijacked by one of our own: Chris Austin used it in his 3 O'clock contest on Monday. See, it pays to pay attention to KORA! We shoulda!

***

Granger Smith is at it again, check out his latest video creation inspired by "the incident" at last weekends' MTV VMA's with Granger's role inspired by Kanye West.

***

The 2009 Summer of Death ends tonight with the arrival of Autumn. Celebrities: this is your last chance to make what will surely be an impressive list. The Summer of Death is a list of all the movers and shakers who have departed this mortal coil during the summer. This year's list has already be a record breaker. Final tally due tomorrow

It's Kurten For Us

2009-09-21T06:09:00.000-07:00

The Real Roger and Roy

2009-09-17T07:05:00.000-07:00

Heard some word about counterfeit bills being passed around B/CS. Turns out the perps (that's police talk) are using REAL bills to make the fakes. They take $5 dollar bills and bleach the corners and then photo copy a 50 in it's place. Remember, kids,Lincoln on the 5, Grant on the 50 (also Franklin on the $100-just in case).
The Roger and Roy Morning Show is pretty much unaffected by this scam as we live below the poverty line and seldom have access to those denominations. I think counterfeit money should only be used to pay for fake brand names and your change should be given in Monopoly money.

The weather continues to improve in the Brazos Valley after a scorching, sizzling summer. Not that we're assured of being out of 100 degree days entirely for the year, but at least for the last week cooler heads (and other body parts) have prevailed. We haven't even had a Heat Index lately! I'm hoping to get back to sleeping on my back porch again soon. I got a screened back porch with a hammock that i love sleeping in on those handful of nights that the atmosphere is temperate enough to be comfortable. Plus I spent the summer customizing it.

The Summer of Death has claimed another two personalities: Mary Travers of Peter, Paul and Mary fame and Henry Gibson

Mary had been battling leukemia the the last few years. She was 72.
Henry was a still-active actor who I knew best from Rowan & Martin's Laugh-In, but also had roles as Judge Clark Brown on Boston Legal, Father O'Neil in "Wedding Crashers" and Wilbur the pig in the 1973 version of Charlotte's Web. He died after a brief bout with cancer. He would have turned 74 next week.

For you mortal accountants,
Here is a list of fatalities, these are not all, but basically the most universally recognizable.

THE TOLL SO FAR:

--PATRICK SWAYZE

--MICHAEL JACKSON

--FARRAH FAWCETT

--ED MCMAHON

--WALTER CRONKITE

--TED KENNEDY

--Director JOHN HUGHES

--DAVID CARRADINE

--KARL MALDEN

--BILLY MAYS

--Former NFL quarterback STEVE MCNAIR

--"Angela's Ashes" author FRANK MCCOURT

--LES PAUL

--And, of course, GIDGET, the Taco Bell Chihuahua.
The SUMMER OF DEATH officially ends at Midnight next Tuesday

Sick of Roger

2009-09-16T04:25:00.000-07:00

You may not know it - because he seldom complains - but Roger has been under the weather this week. He's pretty sure it's not H1N1 -or "swine - flu. But rather the "whine" flu. He was calling his doctor and grossed us all out with his symptoms. Then his medical team prescribed a miracle treatment (sulphur) without him ever having to make an office appearance. I'm thinking they were just playing it safe in case he's contagious.

Which reminds me of the story of the doctor who told his patent "I've got good news and bad news...the bad news is we don't know what you got. The good news is they're naming it after ME!"
Roger is now administrating a supplement of his Secret Special Chicken Soup to help direct him on the road to recovery. I say no matter how far under the weather he gets he will be completely healed and/or cured by kickoff Saturday. Call it a hunch.

I know I said we'd stop TALKING about the Taylor Swift-Kanye West dust-up, but we never promised not to WRITE about. Here's the latest:Kanye gave a personal apology to "T" following her appearance on “The View” yesterday. During the broadcast, she said West had yet to contact her to apologize for hijacking her acceptance speech on the MTV Video Music Awards on Sunday. “He has not personally reached out or anything but if he wanted to say hi (I would),” said Swift. After Swift’s comments, West called her and the two spoke, according to a statement from “The View.” The statement said while Taylor “accepted Mr. West’s apology. The contents of the phone call are to remain private.”

Here's Taylor on The View.

Swift Reactions

2009-09-15T04:25:00.000-07:00

Messages and Twitters of support are pouring in for Taylor Swift who was disrespected at the MTV VMA broadcast on Sunday. As you know by now, hip-hop artist and all-around class act Kanye West performed a speechus interruptus during Li'l Taylors acceptance speech. You remeber Kanye is the guy who interrupted Gretchen Wilson under similar circumstances a couple years back and said "George Bush doesn't like Black people" at a Katrina relief fundraising telecast.

Not surprisingly, B-F-F Kellie Pickler was quick to comment. She Tweeted, "Tater Tot, you handled yourself with grace. Kanye, don't mess with my lil' sis."

Brad Paisley chimed in, "Poor Kanye. So shy, so humble, such a class act. Why doesn't anyone like him? I mean, come on! Just kidding, of course. He's a total ass."

Reba McEntire's tweet offered congrats and advice -- "So proud of Taylor winning last night at the VMA's! Way to go girl! Lesson to all of us to keep a firm grip on the microphone."

Blake Shelton was surprisingly G-rated with his comments. "Sorry y'all, but we're just a little bit protective of Taylor Swift around here! Hey Kanye -- by 'around here,' I mean the world. Moron."

Jack Ingram kept it brief but heartfelt. "Taylor Swift is graceful amidst weirdness."

Lady Antebellum's Hillary Scott wrote, "Wish people knew when to keep their mouth shut. Love ya', T!"

Jewel Tweeted, "You can't steal Taylor Swift's thunder. He only made himself look like an ass."

David Nail chastised Kanye's entire genre. "Unfortunately, the pop - hip-hop world is much too forgiving. I hope he's crucified by the national media."

Justin Moore, not one for holding back, cut straight to the chase. "I'd like to kick the [crap] out of Kanye West."

Randy Houser also had a brief, but effective tweet: "Pretty much would love to get redneck on Kanye's ass right now. Classless."

Joe Nichols wrote, "I guess Kanye gets off on picking on little girls. I guess that's part of his small man complex."

And from the pop world, Pink wrote, "Kanye West is the biggest piece of [crap] in the world. Quote me. My heart goes out to Taylor Swift. She is a sweet and talented girl who deserved her moment. She should know we all love her." And

Katy Perry addressed Kanye directly, Tweeting, "It's like you stepped on a kitten."

The Roger and Roy Morning Show now declares our participation in this story to be over. Unless something really juicy happens. Plus we're instituted a lifetime ban on even mentioning Kanye again.

Someone we still talk about is Granger Smith who not only makes great records, he compiles video for his song. Check out the LOST FOOTAGE from his "Gypsy Rain"

Rainy Days Ahead

2009-09-11T05:08:00.000-07:00

Another Barrel Full of RnR

2009-09-09T05:57:00.000-07:00

Roger came in this morning teasing us with a story about a quick run to Conroe he made last night. He wouldn't say why right away claiming it was a secret mission, but I immediately concluded he went to Cracker Barrel. We're always talking about some special Country compilation discs available only at CBs and Conroe has been the closest geographical location we've had. Now comes word that the Barrel will roll into Bryan soon, opening in the new Target Center in Bryan. Maybe we'll finally get that "Best of Roger and Roy" disc we've been hoping for.

The Astros season may be in the dumper for 2009, but some strange masochistic tendency keeps watching the games. Now I know why. I can still learn things about the game I never knew. Last night I was watching the Astros and Braves when one of "them" hit an easy pop fly to the outfield. The announcers, Jim Deshaies and Bill Brown called the catch a "can of corn". Now I'd heard this phrase often and particularly this year, and guessed it's meaning but not it's origin. Turns out it dates back to old time grocers who used one of those grabbing sticks to get merchandise from the upper reaches of the shelves. A can of corn would be an easy item retrieved and then dropped to the grocers open apron below. Therefore an easy catch became know as a "can of corn". You're Welcome. Go Rangers.

New "Guitar Hero" game is being released today with Beatles music available for the first time. It took long negotiations and a phalanx of lawyers to make it happen. While the world (the gaming world, anyway) eagerly anxiously awaits the opportunity to hear Beatles music while they play along on the Fake Guitar, Fake Bass, and Fake Drums, I couldn't help but wonder if it hurts personal creativity rather than help it. You don't have to learn any chords or tuning but still spend hours playing. But after all those gaming hours (which would be better served by actually playing a real guitar), you still can't pick out "Mary Had A Little Lamb". I thought maybe mine were just the ravings of an Old Fart until I saw in todays news that the bass player for the Rolling Stones and Drummer for Pink Floyd are quoted as saying basically the same thing. Oops. They're Old Farts, too. Never mind.

And not only THAT, but where's the COUNTRY GUITAR HERO. No respect, we get no respect.

Talking with my son Alex (or RG2) the other day about forgetfulness. I recommended to him to do what I've started doing recently: carrying a little notebook around and writing down the tasks and appointments I need to remember. This method has worked well for me so far. Except on occasions I'll be in the bedroom and the notebook will be in the living room. By the time I get there, I'll not only forget what I wanted to write down, I'll forget why I'm in the living room.

Manual Labor Day

2009-09-08T04:14:00.000-07:00

Spent the day yesterday doing actual physical labor at the house: mowing the (dead brown) grass, pulling the (green healthy) weeds, patching the hose, putting a brace on my market umbrella, anchoring my solar powered Angel on the roof (don't ask- long story). I actually worked up a sweat!

It was good to get outside again. The killer heat has been keeping me indoors out of the sun's death rays for many weeks. The last time I was mowing the grass I came this close to heat stroke and did the yard work in several segments over a couple of days. I have a renewed respect for those whose job requires outdoor work.
As you know, Roger & Roy consider our job an "occupation" rather than "work". "Work" usually involves a shovel.

Howdy folks, The State Fair and Fried Food Capital of Texas announced this year's winning recipes for the deep-friend competition which has been held annually since 2005 and has given us fine classic culinary fare such as Texas Fried Cookie Dough, Chicken Fried Bacon and Deep-Fried Twinkies. This years finalists included Green Goblins (stuffed cherry peppers); Twisted Yam on a Stick (rolled in butter, cinnamon and sugar); Texas Fried Pecan Pie (drizzled with caramel sauce); Country Fried Pork Chips (dip ’em in gravy); Sweet Jalapeño Corn Dog Shrimp; and Fried Peanut Butter Macaroon (just as it sounds).
After years of trying, Christi Erpillo enjoyed
sweet success when her Fernie's Deep Fried Peaches & Cream won for best taste in the Big Tex Choice Awards on Monday.

Abel Gonzales picked up the title of Most Creative food: Fried Butter Sticks.He wraps seasoned butter in a dough and fries it. His delicacy — comes in regular butter, garlic, grape and cherry —

All these foods are recommended (before we've even sampled them) as part of a complete meal by the Roger and Roy Morning Show. Some have enough calories for a week's worth of meals...

The 80s Are Back

2009-09-03T04:49:00.000-07:00

Garth Brooks is proving you don't have to record, tour, or even sing to win awards. the G-man will be inducted into Oklahoma State University Hall of Fame from which he was graduated 25 years ago. He'll be Big Man on Campus and Grand Marshall of the Homecoming Parade on October 17.

Meanwhile Reba McEntire is atop the Country charts for the 2nd week with her new CD Keep On Loving You and George Strait's Twang at number two. When's the new Judds album come out?

And now, Back To The Future: Football Season is here again (you can tell it's Fall in the Brazos Valley when temperatures dip below 100). To help you pump up for Aggieball, Roger recommends this article by Richard Justice in the Houston Chronicle.

Today is the anniversary of the largest hailstone ever discovered. It fell in Aurora, NE. It had a circumference of 17.5 inches and weighed 1.67 lbs. We were wondering how you compare a stone of that size. Y'know when assessing hail size we usually make common comparisons: penny-sized, quarter, golf ball, softball sized. Butch at Maaco says that would be "steering wheel" size.

Closer Coffee Wakes Up Roger and Roy

2009-09-02T04:57:00.000-07:00

Welcome to Roger's Coffee Club. Because the walk out the studio and across the hallway became to much, Roger has moved his private coffee contraption into to the studios for easier access. It is completely portable and mobile and easy to assemble/pack up (he doesn't trust it alone without him). If you stop by during the morning be sure to bring your travel mug. Next week we hope to add Bear Claws and orange wedges...

Somehow we got into a discussion about The Tonight Show and how long a show it was back in the early Carson era: I said two hours, Roger said it's always been one. We were both wrong. Back in the day a network newscast would run from 10 until 10:15 Central, then Tonight at 10:15. Eventually, local affiliates began running their own news at 10:15 and Tonight had a second opening at 10:30. After a while Ed McMahon hosted the 15 minute early segment and Johnny Carson joined in at the half hour. Then Carson decided he didn't want McMahon going on first and that segment was eliminated entirely. I still seem to remember a 90 minute show, but I have no evidence to back it up. By the way, it wasn't until after Carson retired that the show began at :35 like all the other late-nighters. It was in his contract.

Phone call from Becky Rune who informed us she may have to return her "Mother of the Year" award after neglecting to call yesterday to tell us of her 14-year-old son's birthday. She asked if it was still OK to give a guy that age cupcakes. We said it was all right unless she called him "cupcake". She never did mention his name...

Becky also informs us she's been job hunting. She is hoping to be employed as a bicep or calf model. If you know anyone hiring, call Roger and Roy.

Butch from Maaco talked about cooking and washing dishes. Butch informed us that he and Nelda struck a bargain before marriage: she said "I don't cook", he said "I do". He said "I don't do dishes" she said "I will" and that was the start of their storybook marriage.

Jack in 24/ 215

2009-08-25T08:18:00.000-07:00

Today's the day for Jack Ingram's new CD "Big Dreams and High Hopes". As you may recall Jack has pledged to do marathon radio interviews with about 215 stations throughout the USA including our own hometown airwaves of 98.3 KORA around 6:30pm with Chris Austin asking the questions. Jack should be good and giddy by that time.
Meantime, we've been eavesdropping on the proceedings via Jack's TwitterCam (?!?) on the CMT website.

Also out today is Deryl Dodd's new CD "Together Again" featuring the song of the same name. In fact, the song is so good we played the Deryl version along with the original Buck Owens and the Emmylou Harris 70's cut. You just can't get too much of a really good song.

Another CD of interest is a new oldies CD from Willie Nelson called "American Classic". It's in the vein of "Stardust" from the 80's. This time featuring the twin chanteuses Norah Jones and Diana Krall. Willie covers Willie with another recording of "Always On My Mind". Also Willies Farm Aid concert is offering front row seats for your Farmer Fotos.

Our Good Advice for the day was "Five Ways To Avoid A Speeding Ticket" we rejected the suggestion "Don't speed" as being unrealistic.

Summer of Love and Death

2009-08-14T08:19:00.000-07:00

Ain't it funny how on the 40th Anniversary of the so-called Summer of Love, we'd be experiencing The Summer of Death? Since June of 2009 we've lost a number of notables including Ed McMahon, Walter Cronkite,Farah Fawcett, Micheal Jackson, Steve McNair, John Hughs and Gidget the Taco Bell Dog.
Now it's guitarist/engineer/innovator Les Paul who passed on from complications with pneumonia. He was 94. Les revolutionized music when he invented the SOLID BODY ELECTRIC GUITAR. Gibson Guitars began a production model in 1952 and it is still one of the most widely-used guitars in the world.
With his wife, Mary Ford, on vocals he also developed the recording process of multi-tracking, where singers are able to sing along with themselves on two or more different takes.
Although the Rock & Roll world has much to thank him for, he also had Country connections: he did an album with Chet Atkins called "Chester and Lester" that won a Grammy in 1976 and followed that with "Guitar Monsters a couple years later.

If you want to hear some prime Les Paul, use this link: http://www.rhapsody.com/les-paul

My favorite is "How High The Moon?" great guitar, great multi-track sound.

2009-08-12T08:18:00.000-07:00

*Today we learned that graduating Aggies this weekend will have their diplomas confiscated if they try to leave the ceremonies early. Evidently it has become a problem with people clearing out - some 200 to 300 stage walkers- before the end of the alphabet. To try to curtail this practice, officials will grab your diploma as you try to sneak out and make you come back later in the week to re-claim your sheepskin. They'll be able to spot you by the way you're dressed. Th policy was instigated by a letter-writing campaign from people with names like "Zynda" and "Zwerschke".

* Roger's painful memories of a Randy Travis show of long ago resurfaced this morning as he again related how he had been misled into believing Mr. Travis was sick with "flu" when -in fact - he was working out at the gym and stood Roger up for an interview. Roger has never forgotten nor forgiven...

IN THE NEWS: Bryan City Council has hired a new management company for the LaSalle hotel downtown plus tossed in $615,000 for improvements, including furniture. Up till this time patrons have been sitting on wooden crates around giant wire spools (joke).

Roger and Roy's Good Advice: Five Compliments Women Love to Hear
1. No one could replace you (although,as you already know YOU can be replaced quickly)
2. You light up my life
3. You're perfect just the way you are (potential danger if she starts asking for specifics: "Why? What's wrong with the way I am?")
4. I love your eyes or some other favorite body part: her smile, her legs, her tattoos and piercings.
5. I'm proud of you. This encourages her in the personal goals she's trying meet. Unless, of course, her ultimate plan is to ditch her loser boyfriend. Then don't encourage her.
Once again, you're welcome.

In Country Western Cowboy News: George Strait says he doesn't hardly speak any Spanish, yet "El Rey" on his new "Twang" CD is near mariachi perfect.
Jack Ingram is one of many offering his tributes to Brooks and Dunn who announced their break-up yesterday.
Timbaland wants Taylor. The big-time pop and hip-hop producer wants to do a record with Taylor Swift. He says he loves her voice. Who doesn't?

Dena Gaskin from the Chamber of Commerce came in for a visit and stated all new construction should have a sign on it so we all know what they're building. I agree. What if someone was building a nuclear waste dump and we didn't find out till the ribbon cutting?

RG

Brooks and Dunn and Gibbons

2009-08-11T08:26:00.000-07:00

Brooks and Dunn was the big buzz around the radio this morning. They are planning to bust up the duo after a 2010 Farewell Tour. A "Greatest Hits...and Then Some" package will be released in September, then "The Last Rodeo" tour in the new year (dates and venues yet to be announced).

Meanwhile, in the mail today, a new Brooks and Dunn single with ZZ Top's Billy Gibbons playing guitar and growling a little bit. Must be one a them "then some" songs.

That song immediately launched another debate about what's country and what ain't. A caller making the case that Country Music plagiarizes itself to sing songs with hard-edge guitar work and themes espousing Tractors, and Farmers and "Country" boys and girls. I think the new Brooks and Dunn song even steals a line from an old Brooks and Dunn song.

Oh well. If we play it, it must be Country on some level.

RG

DEATH and VOCAL CORDS

2009-07-24T09:13:00.000-07:00

The "Summer of Death" has claimed another one. This time it's Brenda Joyce who played "Jane" with two different "Tarzans", one of whom was Johnny Weissmuller (the other Lex Barker).
She was also in a bunch of "B-Movies" in the 1940s. She was the seventh actress to play "Jane. Brenda Joyce was 92.

TARZAN TRIVIA: Weissmuller, the most famous Tarzan of them was actually the SIXTH actor to portray the Jungle Man... the famous trademark Tarzan yell was made by combining the voices of a soprano, an alto and a hog caller.

2009-07-24T08:51:00.000-07:00

In Country Western Cowboy News: Sugarland has cancelled three more tour date do to Jennifer Nettles' vocal problems. The undisclosed problems will keep her sidelined for at least a week.
Meanwhile Kenny Chesney has been defending Jen's decision. Apparently some fan sites, message boards and blogs have been critical of her booking studio time the same day as a show.
Sugarland Apologizes for Missing Shows

2009-07-24T08:42:00.000-07:00

Kathy Ross Dropped by for a visit to update us on her life and career. She left for Nashville about 7 years ago (SEVEN years!?!) and now is back in Texas where she plans to finish a new album after summer. Kathy has been working on developing her writing. She'll be opening for Aaron Watson tonight at The Texas Hall of Fame. Kathy has been singing around the area since she was 11.

ALISON AND GIDGET IN OUTER SPACE

2009-07-23T09:26:00.000-07:00

It's another day in Paradise, although the temperatures are approaching Hell-like status again.
What slim chances of rain we had will completely evaporate over the weekend and readings will read 100 and above.

Good night for the baseball teams: Both Astros and Rangers completed 3-game sweeps of their opponents. The 'Stros defeated the feared and hated and pesky Cards to advance to 2nd in the NL Central, while the Rangers pitchers wrassled with the flu and still knocked off the BoSox.

In the news: the University Police is reporting they apprehended the evil-doer who broke into the Bright Building the other day and stole some football pads before scrawling "The Eyes of Texas Are Upon You" on the floor. Despite knowing it was an inside job (the perp had an access code) and being caught on surveillance camera, the suspect will not be charged nor his identity revealed. I would look for someone who favors Burnt Orange clothing. Then again, the Athletic Department has had some major cut-backs recently. I'm just saying...

2009-07-23T09:05:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday Alison Krauss, born this day in 1971 in Champagne, IL and still Roy Gene's Favorite Female Singer. She could sing Metallica and I'd still love it.
Alison, Brad Paisley and Charley Pride played for the President at he White Houuse this week for the world's coolest House Party.

2009-07-23T08:49:00.000-07:00

Brian Blake from the Bush Library and Museum dropped by and we talked about the Space Program, it's past and future. All part of the Beyond the Moon: NASA's Continuing Mission exhibit. Tonights speaker is Richard Garriot, a 2nd Generation space explorer who took a trp to the International Space Station on board a Soyuz TMA-13 spacecraft, at a personal cost of $34 million. When commercial space travel becomes available, I think I'll get my ticket through Priceline.

2009-07-23T08:34:00.000-07:00

today on "Instant Contestant" we learned:

*The "Taco Bell Dog" has died. Her name was Gidget.
*Simon Cowell will have what is termed "a surprise party" this weekend for his 50th birthday.
The biggest surprise: 17 of his ex-girlfriends will be in attendance.
*Because so many performers have passed on this year, celebrity journalists have dubbed 1999 "The Summer of Death"

Have a happy day...

LEANN and EDDIE and BRANDI

2009-07-22T10:13:00.000-07:00

Looks like more domestic trouble for LeAnn Rimes. Rumors had it that she was sampling the wares of her co-star Eddie Cibrian a few months back. She said then it was none of our business, he vehemently denied an affair and now his wife Brandi has split the sheets and given him the boot. She's quoted in the latest issue of US WEEKLY "Eddie and LeAnn (Rimes) deserve each other."
I don't think she meant that in a nice way...

Leann and Eddie co-starred in the Lifetime movie, "Northern Lights". Around that time, "Us Weekly" posted security video of them smooching in a restaurant. Brandi says Eddie has still been seeing LeAnn secretly and nobody sees Dean Sheremet (LeAnn's hubby) anywhere anymore with anyone.

Stay tuned for further (ultimate) developemnts....

2009-07-22T09:40:00.000-07:00

On todays news/weather, we were informed by the National Weather Service that we had no "official" tornadoes on Monday. Since several funnel clouds were spotted in College Station, why don't they count? A former U.S. Marine Meteorologist called and told us if they don't touch the ground, they ain't tornadoes. My next question is who's gonna stand underneath them to inspect?

"A tornado is a violently rotating column of air extending between, and in contact with, a cloud and the surface of the earth." (The Weather Channel)

2009-07-22T09:19:00.000-07:00

James Lann (You're From The Country; Honky Tonk Two Step Queen) called this morning to talk about his show tonight at Schotzi's. He called right in the middle of an "Instant Contestant" competition. We gave him free admission to the show tonight. And he didn't even have to answer any questions!
James is genuine real cowboy stock, his Cattle Kin and Ranching Family goes back several generations. They must be so disappointed in his chosen profession. I suggested he spotlight his heritage by arriving to his shows on horseback, waving his cowboy hat in the air.
He says he'll get "His People" to look into it.

We Read It But Never Said It

2009-07-22T08:42:00.000-07:00

A couple news items we never discussed at length today:

HOME FUNERAL is a type of funeral where everything, including building the coffin, caring for the dead body, hosting the funeral service and even BURYING THE BODY, is done at home.

CAMEL MILK CHOCOLATE The Al Nasma chocolate company in Dubai, United Arab Emirates, plans to expand the company into new markets including the U.S. According to Yahoo News Al Nasma is the world's first and only chocolate maker that uses CAMEL MILK to make its milk chocolate

A THIEF IN FLORIDA Sean "Crazy Cracker" Roberts of Riverview, Florida broke into a mobile home and robbed its owners at gunpoint.
Sean was later identified by his victims after they recognized a distinguishing mark on his FACE .

Sour Sugar

2009-07-21T08:57:00.000-07:00

Jennifer Nettles had to cancel her shows with Kenny Chesney and Kieth Urban this past weekend.
The prognosis is not good for THIS weekend, either.
Jennifer says she blowed out her voice and doesn't want to break it:

http://www.sugarlandmusic.com/news_d.aspx?nid=4675

Country Superheros

2009-07-21T08:02:00.000-07:00

You've seen Country performers acting on TV and movies - even on stage, like Reba.
But Trace Adkins has registered a "first" as the star of a ... comic book ("graphic novel" to you fans). 12 Gauge Comics is releasing a four-issue series titled "Trace Adkins is . . . Luke McBain".
The character looks and, presumably, behaves like the real Trace. The premise is based on Trace's life philosophy. The writers say they consulted with Trace so they could put a lot of his personality into the character.

-It's set in Louisiana, which is where Trace is from. Luke returns home after serving 14 years in prison for a crime he didn't commit (prisons are full of innocent men). The town is now controlled by bad guys, and Luke is the only man willing to set things right.

With an axe handle...

This sounds nothing at all like Walking Tall and Buford Pussor, does it?

Anyway, the first issue will escape in November, around the same time that Trace is supposed to go on tour (co-incidence?). It'll run you $3.99 a pop.

2009-07-20T08:11:00.000-07:00

Still learning how to do this new-fangled "blog" thing. Hope to able to add Pictures, Audio, Video and Twitter soon. Real soon.
Meanwhile, we are all enjoying our first rains in the Brazos Valley from Sunday. Some Southern areas of the County experienced severe weather warnings and golf-ball sized hail. (How come they never promote "hail-sized golf balls?).
I had promised to run naked through the rain if it ever occurred. Unfortunately I was driving along Earl Rudder Freeway By Pass 6 when it happened. I was not a pretty sight.
Stopped by to see Miss Rita and staff at the Longhorn Tavern Steakhouse Saturday. I wanted to get in one final dinner at the original, classic location before operations move to the new location sometime next week. By the way, where is the new location? We've been saying it'll be in the Old Coke offices/ warehouse. I know I was here when it was operational, but can't quite remember where that was/is. That area has been rebuilt and redesigned several times since then, Oh well, I'm sure they'll provide a map for the new location. Keep ya updated.

Today was the anniversary of the First Men On The Moon, Neil Armstrong and "Buzz" Aldrin, 40 years ago. All three crew (including the guy they left back orbiting on the command module to do some light housekeeping and prepare dinners while the other two explored the Lunar Surface) are still alive and scheduled to visit the White House today. It's hard to believe it all happened so long ago. Also hard to believe it's been so long since we LAST went to moon.
So, naturally our question of the day dealt with the less-than-famous words from the SECOND man on the moon who said as he dropped to the Lunar Surface "That's a good last step...)
This week we'll have passes for live music from Ryan Beaver and Brett Crenshaw, Johnny Cooper, Aaron Watson plus Bart Crow Band and The Blue Brussard at the Texas State Line Friday at Harry's.

Astronauts deal with flooded toilet in orbit

CAPE CANAVERAL, Fla. — The bathroom lines at the already crowded space shuttle and space station complex got a lot longer Sunday because of a flooded toilet.

One of two commodes aboard the international space station broke down, right in the middle of complicated robotic work being conducted by the two crews. The pump separator apparently flooded.
Mission Control advised the astronauts to hang an "out of service" sign on the toilet until it could be fixed. In the meantime, the six space station residents had to get in line to use their one good toilet. And Endeavour's seven astronauts were restricted to the shuttle bathroom.
There have never been so many people — 13 — together in space.
The toilet repair work fell to Belgian Frank De Winne and American Michael Barratt, who had to don goggles, gloves and masks. They ripped apart the compartment, working well into the evening. Mission Control finally instructed them to call it a day and resume the effort Monday morning.
Flight director Brian Smith declined to speculate whether overuse caused the toilet trouble.

2009-07-16T08:16:00.000-07:00

What a crazy day in the studio...a power outage in Bryan last night caused mayhem with all of our equipment, even the transmitter was in low power! Thanks to everyone who called in to tell us about it, and a special thanks to the lady who said she just couldn't put on her face in the morning with Roger & Roy blasting out of the bathroom radio....a special thank you to our engineers who scrambled to the station and got us back on full blowtorch by 8am...

Catch us on Friday's show at 7:50 for the question of the day, worth the final pair of tickets to the 38th annual Bryan breakfast Lions club PRCA Rodeo....and at 9:20am tomorrow we will play Instant contestant for free admission to see Kyle Park at the Hall of Fame...stay cool ya'll!

Roger

2009-07-15T13:40:00.000-07:00

Have you played instant contestant yet? The questions are multiple choice, and on the Roger & Roy Morning show, 'Inflection is everything." (that means we say two answers in a normal voice, and YELL the correct answer...plus the correct answer is always C. It's hard to lose, but a few people have manged to do it)

Here are the questions from today's show:

This Hip Hop star is having some tattoos removed because he is tired of covering them up when making movies...who is it?

A. Soulja Boy
B. Lay-Z
C. FIFTY CENT!

120 Kids are injured everyday across the USA by this plumbing appliance in the home...what is it?
A. Kitchen Sink
B. Bathroom plunger
C. THE BATHTUB!

Survey sez: One in Five bosses will not consider a job applicant if their resume includes this...
A. The truth
B. Ugly photo
C. A TYPO!

We usually play around 9:20am and the prize is free admission to a "live" Texas music show.

Roger

2009-07-14T13:04:00.000-07:00

Texas music artist Granger Smith was a celebrity DJ on the Roger & Roy show Tuesday morning, the same day as the release of his new "Don't Listen To The Radio" album. Granger quickly took command, making it the Granger Smith morning show with special guests Roger & Roy! He pulled the question of the day from an app on his i-phone, and was generous in giving away free admission to catch No Justice at Schotzis tonight in our Instant Contestant contest, but made each winner promise to also come by Hastings in College Station for the Granger Smith CD release party. There was the beautiful babe from Granger's "Don't Listen to the radio" music video in the studio too. her name is Amber...you will see her listed as "girlfriend" in the liner notes of the new CD.

Roger

Friday, July 10

2009-07-14T04:56:00.000-07:00

We had the big purple party dude on the show this morning...he gave us
little purple baseball bats as special gifts...the purple dude is Reggy
and you can see him this weekend at the Bombers baseball games with
Victoria...hey, and coming next Tuesday, Granger Smith is back in the
studio with us to celebrate the release of his new CD, 'Don't Listen To
the Radio," which, as luck would have it, is being released on Tuesday.
Granger is supposed to be the DJ and interview us...I've got my fake
answers ready to go....Taking my little one to swim lessons this
afternoon, and I'm looking forward to a rare weekend around the
house...stay cool ya'll!

Roger